Submitted by [deleted] t3_z8tcjm in relationship_advice
N3rdScool t1_iyd63g1 wrote
Reply to comment by TheHunyBadjer in Is there any way to save my relationship after cheating? by [deleted]
Maybe if it was one mistake... how many of the same mistakes do you make until you can say it's not one?
TheHunyBadjer t1_iyd6glq wrote
i mean as many as the person is willing to give. Personally speaking i wouldn't take a cheater back but if the dude who got cheated on is willing to forgive and forget multiple times why not let them.
N3rdScool t1_iyd7897 wrote
He forgave once if I am reading right... I do agree he may take her back who knows but she will cheat again if he does. "accidentally" of course.
TheHunyBadjer t1_iyd85us wrote
maybe so or maybe not. But people can change after making the same mistake multiple times. I really think the only way the relationship works is if she proves with her actions (not her words) that she not going to cheat again; like going to therapy, being transparent and open not engaging in shady shit etc. Not saying its right but when someone cheats it's usually because the other partner wasn't doing something fulfilling
N3rdScool t1_iyd8u8b wrote
I mean break up if you're unfulfilled... If he takes her back it teaches her nothing...
I really believe if she was going to prove it, it would have to happen after they break up to give him time to heal. They don't have kids and are not married, it just seems like a lot of work when dude could be happy and himself with someone else.
TheHunyBadjer t1_iyd9svr wrote
Very true. But i don't know if it doesn't teach her anything, maybe after this time she feels like shit and she decides to actually change her ways. And if he really loves her and is willing to be with her as she get better so be it.
And are we sure he can do better? to stay with someone you know fucked another dude behind your back kind of makes you a loser. I know dudes who know they're getting cheated on but wont break up with them because they know they won't get anything better.
N3rdScool t1_iydanty wrote
That last paragraph is so toxic I don't even know what to say to that lol
I do hope OP makes better decisions and I hope her bf finds someone who talks about issues instead of cheating. Maybe that will be OP XD
TheHunyBadjer t1_iydb1et wrote
only hope. shit maybe the dude is mind fucking us all and is only staying with her for sex and until he kind find someone better.
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