Listen to his words: “Then I don’t know what love is.” Exactly. The cheating was unfortunate for you as it seems to have racked you with guilt. It’s done. You did it. Put it behind you. But do not allow this guilt to camouflage the truth here. You describe him as your “true best friend.” But that’s not what you want. He has failed to meet even the most basic requirements of a “loving” relationship. He has taken you for granted and has not shown up for you which led you to betray his trust. I’d be packing my bags with the exhilaration and excitement of moving on. But please, stop beating yourself up. In the future, it’s important to clearly articulate to your next BF when things aren’t working. “Hey, I feel unloved, like a roommate. And you’re sleeping in another room. If things don’t change I’m going to have to rethink this relationship.”