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oiler1996 t1_iyeaf7v wrote

Reply to comment by poesnola in Open relationship, now what? by [deleted]

Did you want to open it up because of the connection with this other guy? It is suspisous that you met him at a music festival and now want him to be your first for the open relationship, seems kinda planned out. Trapped how? Im letting you know this wont ruin the open relationship part of your relationship, sleeping with other people will ruin the entire relationship, you will both he single if you go through with this.

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poesnola t1_iyeb3sw wrote

No no, we already have an open relationship for a few months. And we met this guy this weekend. I dont get how this seems planned out. And thank you for your advice, it is really nice to get some different views on this.

Do you really think, that when we both agreed it is okay to sleep with other people, and it happens it will ruin the relationship?

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oiler1996 t1_iyebuhk wrote

I misunderstood i thought you just opened up after meeting this new guy, thats why it sounded planned to me, my apologies.

But yes even though you both agreed to an open relationship i think once you both start sleeping around it will end the relationship. At some point one of you will refuse sex with the other and an insecurity will pop up, do they enjoy another person more, am i not good enough anymore, do they get more outside so they dont need me, am i just an emotional support partner? Its like having a threeway and your partner showing more attention to the other person, it will eventually rub you the wrong way and cause issues.

I honestly think that if a relationship isnt open at the beginning then it should stay closed, more times then not if you open up later in a relationship it ends badly. Just my opinion, never really kool with the thought of my partner fucking someone else or building intimacy with someone.

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yslyric t1_iyejei8 wrote

hey, i’ve been in open relationships and they work as long as ppl are honest and respect boundaries (just like in any relationship)

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