[28M] [25F] My girlfriend slept at a guy's house and told me the next day

Submitted by ThrowRA300069 t3_zzl2a6 in relationship_advice

My girlfriend and I have been together for a few months.

We've been apart for the last few weeks visiting family in different cities but speaking regularly, and today she called to confess that last night she slept at a guy's house who she is friends with (in the same bed as him) and cuddled, but claims nothing sexual happened. She also told me she used to hook up with this guy before she moved to my city half a year ago. She attributed sleeping with him to strong inescapable feelings of loneliness and isolation with us being apart, and her not realizing it was a bad thing to do until she thought about it the next day. Prior to this I've never had the slightest reason to not trust her, and I'm happy at least she told me and didn't hide it.

To me this feels like an absolute relationship-ending violation of trust anyways - it feels like an obvious boundary that shouldn't be crossed, I can't rationalize her doing this, and it's very upsetting... but she's asking me if I'd try going to therapy with her in an attempt to work things out or if I "don't want to try".

I really like this girl but feel like this isn't something that can be worked out and leaning towards just ending it - am I crazy for thinking so? Do people really try to work such issues out a few months into a relationship? I haven't in my life had my trust broken like this so I'm a bit unsure how to feel right now.

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PeteyPorkchops t1_j2c8t7e wrote

It’s only been months and I can guarantee you they slept together that night.

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ayylmao2016 t1_j2chths wrote

Whether anything sexual happened is irrelevant, any time she gets to feeling "lonely and isolated" you will have another incident on your hands and eventually she will stop confessing and just leave you in the dark. You couldn't trust her alone for a couple weeks without this happening.

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biteme717 t1_j2cpujn wrote

End it, because trust is broken and you will never know what they did and her excuse as to why is pathetic! You also don't need to go to couples counseling when you did no wrong. She IMO is trying to manipulate you into going to counseling because you don't trust her and is trying to cover up the cheating.

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lonewolf369963 t1_j2dl14z wrote

You guys have been dating for a few months

You guys were apart for a few weeks and she was feeling lonely and isolated while she was visiting her FAMILY. And all she could find to help her with loneliness was someone who she used to hook up with and now she wants couples counseling.

My friend you have been together for less than 6 months and you're already facing this issue, imagine what will happen when you guys will have to be apart for more duration in future?

You guys don't need couple's counselling, she needs an individual one to get over her personal issues and you need to block her once and for all. I can assure you there will be a lot of drama in the future if you decide to stick with her.

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Web822 t1_j2ea8te wrote

It's ridiculous to even enter these dialogs.

a few months of relationship

you don't need therapy, get rid of it

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