You need to care about alimony and child support. Frankly, that’s part of the reason you’ve allowed this to go on for so long. He clearly cares about his finances, that’s why he’s not contributing fairly. This relationship has bankrupted you, financially, mentally, and emotionally. You’re so deep in the hole you don’t even know you’re in it. One of the reasons he probably doesn’t want to marry you is so he doesn’t have to pay alimony. This is exactly what alimony is for: your devotion to the home and your kid has severely limited your ability to financially take care of yourself, and has increased his financial stability (he’s saved so much money by not contributing to the upkeep of your kid).

Clearly, you’re capable of taking care of yourself and your son. Perhaps he’s beaten you down emotionally for so long you don’t believe it anymore. Keep going to therapy and share ALL of this with your therapist.

You’re asking this man for permissions to make decisions about your own life. You don’t need his permission. Use the credit card and put your son in daycare.

Use that time to rebuild your business. Your boyfriend (he’s not your partner) doesn’t have to like it and he doesn’t have to agree. Take that money and hire a damn lawyer. You need to leave this relationship and he needs to pay child support.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this; this is a very hard lesson to learn…you’ve given up your life to live his and it’s literally hurting you in more ways than one. It’s not worth it sweetheart.