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quickcalamity t1_j2eqh3k wrote

I mean this doesn’t sound like you’re compatible at all and she does not sound very generous even in the blowjob department. Her inability and utter avoidance of sex could be due to trauma or childhood abuse of some kind? You can have the conversation but it’s not going to change anything. Unless you’re looking to marrying your own right hand (or left hand?), then it looks like you need to reassess.

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ThrowRASexTalk_ OP t1_j2er5in wrote

I want to talk to her first. I just need to know the right approach for it.

I'm sure there's no abuse or trauma.

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quickcalamity t1_j2esnbh wrote

People on this sub always ask, “how do I tell them?” “How do I say…?” These sorts of conversations are never easy, but you have to say the words. “Hey, we’ve been together X amount of years. I love you and desire you but I’m not feeling that in return. If things don’t change, I’ll have to rethink the relationship.” There might be a guy out there for her , but you’re not him.

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ThrowRASexTalk_ OP t1_j2euad3 wrote

Thanks for the template. I think I can word it around that.

> There might be a guy out there for her , but you’re not him.

If it feels like we can't move past this, so be it. But I want to try all options first. I'm very invested in her and she feels the same way.

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