Submitted by [deleted] t3_10qbmoq in relationship_advice
Sea_Duty182 t1_j6p1bpo wrote
Reply to comment by SheBeeMe in Im worried m32 my fiance f31 fancy her work colleague by [deleted]
There very good friends, which is great. But she is all she talks about.
I noticed she keeps her phone on her alot and curiosity got the better of me :/
ryux999 t1_j6p599c wrote
you’re shitty for snooping
Sea_Duty182 t1_j6p5ud5 wrote
Your missing the point.. Read what I wrote again. I had suspicions and was right.. but I don't know what it means
SheBeeMe t1_j6p75rm wrote
What were you right about? Because from where I'm sitting you sound paranoid and delusional. You haven't said anything that remotely sounds inappropriate or like cheating. All she's guilty of is being excited to have a good friend and venting to her.
Sea_Duty182 t1_j6p7wy6 wrote
OK.. why would she literally make things up about our relationship.. not just small things, for example she completely made up we used to live somewhere else and may have to move away again.. why would someone say that?
DM_ME_YOUR_PET_PICSS t1_j6p97kx wrote
To me, it sounds like your GF is a liar, not a cheater.
I once had a friend that fabricated a lot of stuff just to have something to talk about, I knew that a lot of what he said was BS but he was still fun to hang out with and the lies were harmless.
That being said, idk why your GF is making things up. You would have to ask her.
Sea_Duty182 t1_j6pbyqy wrote
I don't know how to approach it, and the fact I almost sensed something was different beforehand and noticed the change in behaviour says there is something more to it.
DM_ME_YOUR_PET_PICSS t1_j6pcx9b wrote
Well you already snooped, but you can’t really bring anything up without admitting that.
Might just have to say something like “hey _____, I went through your phone and noticed how you were talking to _____. Is there a reason your telling her fake things?”
Could backfire massively if she takes this as an invasion of privacy, which it was, and try to say that you shouldn’t know that stuff anyway, you shouldn’t. But there is basically 0 other way to find out unless you talk to the other women.
Sea_Duty182 t1_j6pep6o wrote
Yeah I get what your saying. I feel shitty for looking because I do trust her. Maybe I'm insecure I don't know:(
Crazy_Perception_731 t1_j6p9tvf wrote
People make up stories to give them things to talk about with their friends. Makes them look like a more interesting person.
Sea_Duty182 t1_j6pc1rc wrote
I get that but surely not to this extent
Crazy_Perception_731 t1_j6pe63j wrote
I have had friends with crazy imaginations. 😂 It was like they lived in a fantasy world.
SheBeeMe t1_j6pex7n wrote
People sometimes exaggerate to their friends to make themselves seem more interesting. Who knows why she said that?
You on the other hand, seem to be the one with the biggest issue. You seem to lack self awareness, are inappropriately invasive of her space, and almost seem controlling.
She's allowed to talk to her friends. That doesn't give you the right to accuse her of cheating. You are behaving irrationally and unreasonably.
So, she told a lie about the two of you moving. Big deal. Instead of accusing her of cheating, own your behavior and tell her that you've been spying on her.
Sea_Duty182 t1_j6pfmhk wrote
I can assure you I am none of the above. We have a very open relationship where we often do our own things so please don't make assumptions.
It is a big deal to me because I don't get why she'd make up stuff. I haven't gone into detail, but the depth of the fake stories is what bothers me. Not just a passing comment but it goes on and on..
SheBeeMe t1_j6pjrkb wrote
You seem to be missing the point. You have been spying on her. If you don't like what you found, then you need to come clean about your behavior and tell her what you saw.
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