Witty-Permission8283 t1_j6p1vim wrote on January 31, 2023 at 9:58 PM

People who love each other don't act like that. You're codependent. Not in love.

While you both didn't choose the mental health issues you have, you are responsible for how you act and what you do to help yourself. You admitted you're not in therapy? Why?

Are you an abuser? Yes. You hit someone. And you threatened to kill yourself to make her stay. You need inpatient care to stabilize and deal with these issues. She cannot be your therapist.

Right now in your current states, you two should not be together.

d0ntw0rryabout1t t1_j6phsqm wrote on January 31, 2023 at 11:44 PM

I agree that we are probably a bit codependent but there’s no denying we share an incredible amount of love for each other. I haven’t been to therapy recently due to not being able to afford it but I have already booked an appointment following this incident.

Also I have to make it clear that I was already feeling suicidal this wasn’t a ploy to make her stay. I can think rationally now and see how dramatic and ridiculous it all is now but it’s not the first time I have felt extremely suicidal and wanted to act upon it. I will admit the guilt from hurting her and my loneliness made me try to jump out the window as I felt I was a horrible person and did not want to live. I am aware I need help. Have needed it since I was a kid but had emotionally neglectful parents. We both have past trauma and need help to grow as people. Hopefully we can be together again one day but right now I agree that it’s too toxic and harmful.