Submitted by secondaccount22223 t3_10pyhd5 in relationship_advice
TL
Friday night I caught my boyfriend lying to me. I want to make this short and to the point as I believe I have the facts straight now because he was honest after getting caught. Friday my boyfriend and his newly single best friend (his bestfriends fiancé just called off engagement because of his infidelity) told me they were going out to the bar to shoot pool. No problem at all as my boyfriend is a great dad and spends everyday with us I knew he needed a break. I woke up around 1 am to realize he still wasn’t home, I gave him a call and he said he was still at the bar however when he answered it was pin drop quiet (not like bar setting) and I heard a girls voice in background and a dog barking. I FaceTimed him and quickly saw he was in an apartment complex and told him to come home immediately as idk why he was lying. He proceeded to show me he was with his buddy on the ft and another girl and said he was coming home now. Fast forward and we talked things through and he told me he lied because his buddy was talking with that girl and they went back to her unit so she could walk her dog and he lied because he didn’t want me to worry as he knows I can be very insecure and not always trust guys(this is true). His buddy called when he got home (on his phone) and told me he was sorry and that he was dragging around my bf to stop there and not be mad but as soon as we got off phone I realized my bf had deleted all of their messages to each other. I thought this was suspicious and he also came clean and said him and his buddy were texting earlier and had intended to meet with a group of girls and my boyfriend was going to just wingman for him and my bf was saying “that they better be hot” so that’s why he deleted his messages. My boyfriend has never been caught lying to me before and so this has all been shocking and I’m trying to figure out how to appropriately handle my emotions about this as we have a daughter together and I don’t want to distrust him or think he would cheat on me. Moving forward he said he doesn’t think it’s wrong to be a wingman however because of this friends own infidelities that ended his engagement I worry this friend could be a bad influence and I don’t know that I feel comfortable with them going out late as we are all almost 30 years old why does a grown man need a wing man? I feel like being a wing man is a good excuse to just talk to other girls when you go out. If you read this long I appreciate it, what would your thoughts be on this situation?
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