My F26 wife is being very unfaithful to our marriage I'm M 25

Submitted by ThrowRAclimbON t3_10q5kkd in relationship_advice

What do I do I'm stuck

Hello everyone this is my first post and I don't know how much to say but.. it all starts with a high school ex that eventually me and her started talking again 6 years after and eventually started dating again one thing to mention she was at the time pregnant with someone else's baby but I expected that I had no problem I wanted kids myself at some point so thought to myself okay well this is a good start her previous ex was horrible to her through the pregnancy so flash to now and there was a couple times that she went back to him and to me he was always able to convince her to do what he wants she now has a EPO against him and we are currently married for 4 months now I have been working out of town and for about a week I noticed that she was very weird with her phone trying to turn it away from me in bed things like that always on it and it was all huge signs of her texting him even though she wasn't supposed to at all I know this because that's what she did before the EPO so one day she left her phone upstairs and asked me to grab it and I know I shouldn't have done this but I just had to see for myself I unlocked her phone and what I seen absolutely broke me she was sexually texting him and it went on for so long I finally sucked it all up and talked to her about it and she came clean she told me that she felt that I wasn't there enough and that I didn't give her enough attention and that it was pretty because she should have talked to me first but instead found attention from someone else and her baby daddy was easy to get it from.. I threw the word out the big D divorce and she begged me not to so I said one chance one last chance and you have to get some help with it all. The next day she went and got some counseling and said it really helped yet didn't show me anything so I gave her the benefit of the doubt and moved on and hoped that she would grow from this.. last week I got home from work and found that there was vape juice and Pepsi with hollindays sauce as well the vape juice was not mine and she hats papsi and the sauce yet I know for a fact that her baby daddy loves that sauce and papsi and when I was I was helping her move out in to my house that's the vape juice he used and swore by it.. when I asked her about it all she said she had made the sauce for our daughter and the papsi was hers yet again she hates pepsi and she said she had no idea where the juice came from and that she was scared that it just showed up in our home oh and side note it was in our bedroom.. at this point I'm completely done and heartbroken and can't seem to bring myself another day because I love our daughter she is a little over 1 years old and sees me as her dad and I see her as my daughter.. please help I'm so stuck and can't seem to figure any of this out..

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Legitimate_Phrase_41 t1_j6nzgll wrote

She isn't going to change, I totally understand not wanting to be away from your child, but you will be wondering what she's really doing when she goes to the store, gas station, etc.... Without trust a relationship is done, I would walk away.

Unless you can live with her leading a double life... Some people can do it but I couldn't.

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ThrowRAclimbON OP t1_j6nzt07 wrote

I completely understand you and really respect your comment ! Thank you side note my daughter is stepdaughter I do love her as my own but it's getting harder and harder every day to be normal around home

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Consistent_Patient88 t1_j6o0te1 wrote

Thank your lucky stars that you can get a clean break away from her. She won’t change. Don’t let her use you.

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ThrowRAclimbON OP t1_j6o1nml wrote

Very true I can and honestly she doesn't work right now she has a job and barely works I work 50 plus hours a week and still come out with nothing each pay because I pay for almost everything you are right and I need to stop letting her use me thank you

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Consistent_Patient88 t1_j6o1wbu wrote

She’s using you. Pack your bags and leave her to it. She can call on baby daddy to support her ass. Don’t allow yourself to be treated like this. You deserve better.

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ThrowRAclimbON OP t1_j6o2eww wrote

I'm out of town till Friday as soon as I'm back I'm going to have to it's going to be hard but this was my last effort to get some understanding on it all and everyone here has helped me shed light on it thank you

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Consistent_Patient88 t1_j6o2kic wrote

Good for you. You’ll feel much better in the long run. You don’t want to live your life wondering what she’s up to etc. Best of luck to you.

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Maddiesmydog t1_j6nzrix wrote

You know what you have to do.

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ThrowRAclimbON OP t1_j6nzwyk wrote

I know it's really hard but I know thank you

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Maddiesmydog t1_j6o03ds wrote

If not soon you’ll be raising the second baby coming.

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ThrowRAclimbON OP t1_j6o0fh3 wrote

And that's what I'm scared of our first baby is from her previous relationship so honestly I have no obligation to be with her or her daughter I do however love her daughter as my own but I'm worried as well so honestly you are right I need to get out of this whole situation before it gets more hard

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uchihapower17 t1_j6oio53 wrote

End it like literally now, send her back to the streets

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ThrowRAclimbON OP t1_j6ojmqo wrote

I admire your ambitions but I do have a heart for the kid haha she is only 1 years old

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uchihapower17 t1_j6okpkv wrote

That will need to end buddy, the relationship can't work as she's had an affair. Not saying it won't hurt but better long term.

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ThrowRAclimbON OP t1_j6nyian wrote

May I comment there are many other instances that add to this but it's hard to explain all please ask if any of you have questions I'll be happy to shed light on more of this

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