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Ozarkian_Tritip t1_j3xvldk wrote

It took three posts for him to ask his supporters not to attack the family. The family didn't even end up taking the money despite the fact many were saying they were money hungry. Doesn't change the fact that Peter ghosted the family and seeked out a lawyer for "deformation".

Never meet your heros folks.


Jimithyashford t1_j3xzlst wrote

In have to ask, what would a guy who made this fella's mistake need to do to make it right? At least according to you.

Like me, let's pretend I did something similar. I had offered a % of my intake towards a local family or cause, and had gotten preoccupied with other things and totally forgotten to actually cut the check for $1200 or whatever it was.

Ok so, I realize I've made this terrible mistake. Realize I've caused harm, and want to make amends and do the right thing to atone for my mistake.

What is the right course of action?

I think most people would say very publicly owning up to the mistake with no excuses other than pure failure on your own part, and then immediately following through with the money you'd pledged would be the right thing to do.

I think most people would consider that to be the right and proper thing needed to atone for the mistake.

But you seem to not think it's enough. So then I must ask you, what would be enough in your view? Not to make you not angry at the person, anger takes time to go away, but for you to say "They've done everything they can to make this right and atone properly for the mistake they made."

I don't know the Thai Express guy. I've never eaten there. I have no loyalty to him whatsoever. But I do know that people fuck up, and when they do they should be able to make amends, assuming the fuck up isn't something unforgivable.

My entire stake in this conversation is trying to understand why some people think the guy hasn't done the right things to make amends, and understand what more people expect in a situation like this? Obviously the most ideal answer is "not have fucked up in the first place"....but that's not reality. People will always fuck up.


stone500 t1_j3y9ojg wrote

Also once lawyers got involved, you gotta be really careful with what you say about anything. Him making a post at all until the matter was resolved was probably a bad idea by itself.

In any case, criticism to Nett on this matter is fair. He's gonna have to take it on the chin and do better moving forward


Ozarkian_Tritip t1_j3y1bkx wrote

People were literally shitting on the family in the post he made. And he said nothing about it until the final post. That's not a good look.

Before any of this happened he tried to lawyer up and stop the story from coming out.

A family who lost their child had to deal with harassment from his community because he was initially cryptic about the story.

There is nothing he can do to move past it and be forgiven. He has to move forward and move past this. Do better in the future.


Jimithyashford t1_j3ybtrr wrote

So it’s literally impossible for him to make amends and be forgiven? At least by you?


Ozarkian_Tritip t1_j3ydl7a wrote

What he did was despicable. Like I said once already I'm not boycotting the restaurant or anything like that. I believe he obviously fucked up and what he did is unforgivable. It's a family who never sought him out, whose name was dragged through the mud because he chose to dodge them for months on end. If it was Mike Hikman that shit would be brought up every time one of his restaurants was mentioned in the comments here.


Jimithyashford t1_j3yf8iz wrote

You are correct, when speaking of Hickman, that people with malicious beliefs and a history of shitty behavior are not as easily forgiven as otherwise good and productive members of the community when they make a mistake.

But that's exactly appropriate and as it should be. Serial offenders and dick wads get cut less slack that mostly good people who make a rare terrible mistake. That's a very normal thing and a healthy social dynamic.

So, I dunno, I guess we are talking about personal perception and there is no arguing someone out of an opinion.

To me this is a bad thing the guy did, he is rightly deserving of the criticism he got. He owes an enormous apology to the family, which he gave, owes the proper delivery of the funds, which he did, and the family certainly has the right to bear a grudge against him for a long time.

But otherwise, for just some other John Q Public member of the community to deem this unforgivable....seems silly to me.

But it's what you feel, so it is how it is.


Cloud_Disconnected t1_j4022li wrote

You were pursuing a similar line of thought with me in the other thread.

As far as I'm concerned now, he delivered the money, he apologized, he took responsibility publicly, so he's done all he can. It's not like he has a time machine, and his previous actions indicate that he started this to help the family, not to score social media points or profit from it.

I don't find anything he did unforgivable, or even close to it. I've made mistakes in my life, I don't know anyone who hasn't, so I try to extend the same grace to others that I would have extended to me.


timewreckoner t1_j445wis wrote

>People were literally shitting on the family in the post he made.

Wow, that must've been really gross for them.


merrythoughts t1_j3yzp3k wrote

Not waiting a goddamn 8 months. Actually addressing the family directly. Not allowing the weird fan-bois be fuckin internet bullies.

As a person looking in with no interest in either party and much better food options in a major metro, this guy did shitty shit. Don't portray him as a victim, that's so lame lol


Nerzugal t1_j41zv55 wrote

Yeah, I get that people make mistakes but he had time to make multiple posts on social media asking for money, set up a donation option for in store payments, etc... but then after the fact it slipped his mind because he was too busy/struggling to keep the restaurant open. And then even after people asked questions it was radio silence.

Sure that is a possibility but it just seems strange that if you have time to setup a fundraiser and all of the extra work associated with it (the stuff that benefits yoyr business), you might also have time to pay the family or at least reach out to them (the stuff that benefits the family).

He can get back in good graces but it was a pretty major screw up.


22TopShelf22 t1_j40afin wrote

You must be a relative of the guy. Fix the problem before it got to this point. It was so simple. You seem to be trying to cover for the guy


Substantial-Guide625 t1_j4g3xcg wrote

I didn’t read your post but what would he have to do in my eyes to be forgiven?

Admit publicly he did use the child’s death for publicity and profit, admit he tried to hire a defamation lawyer to stop the story from being ran and no one would pick up the case, admit his ego got in the way of paying the family due to being called out for making their daughters death about his new resturaunt, admit he pushed his father out years ago with a made up story about abuse and resign from the company.

That would be about it for me and I feel a majority of springfieldians. This is after 20 years of going there 2-3 times a week.


Jimithyashford t1_j4j30rt wrote

But what if that’s not true? Are you demanding he lie in order for you to forgive him?


periodbloodsausage t1_j3y0s63 wrote

Stop. So, now he is responsible for everyone else's hot takes on Facebook about the issue? He inquired for a lawyer rec to help guide him through the process, not to sue anyone. He admitted he was wrong, made several posts about how he failed in this instance and was making it right and ended up making it right. What more do you want from the guy? You have every right to not be a patron of Thai Express, but to continue to disparage the man's character after he admitted and owned up to a mistake reflects more about you than him. Being a successful, well-known business owner doesn't exclude you from failure; it just shines a brighter light on you when you do fail. And the dude didn't scurry away like a cockroach.


Ozarkian_Tritip t1_j3y2glz wrote

It's his community and he was very aware of the comments. Yet nothing was said. And he only confronted it because the fucking news got involved. Before that he ignored it. If the news never got involved he would of cockroached it up for the rest of his life.

I'm not even going to stop going to Thai express. All i'm saying he's a shady dude. I'm not even that invested in this. The facts are the facts. I will give him credit for not censoring decent towards him in his community, that gives him a leg up over Mike Hikman.


merrythoughts t1_j3yzvnk wrote

Uhhh he scurried for 8 months. There are consequences for being shitty


TwentyTwelve1 t1_j3ze8ny wrote

Actually, yes. He knew the whole time per the letter he received that the family was not seeking the money nor had they "hired" a lawyer. The lawyer worked pro bono to send a couple of cease and desist letters on their behalf, and then to organize communication between the two parties. But he didnt bother to say that and instead allowed his supporters to push that narrative and leave a barrage of victim blaming comments insinuating the family was "out to get something" and overall bad people. The father addressed this in his post on fb today. Apparently they have even received nasty messages and the like. He did not post the truth about their intentions or implore people to leave positive comments until today, I suspect after he spoke to them and they asked him to.