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OddFeature t1_iuc4i8d wrote

>but the overarching problem will always be discomfort and sexualization of male intimacy in our culture

We definitely need to get over our discomfort of male intimacy as a culture, but I actually think the first and most important step for that is to completely discard the “no homo” mindset and fully embrace that a deep and intimate relationship with another man will inevitably share a lot of similarities with the relationships of gay men, who are also having a deep and intimate relationship with another man. We need to fully deconstruct our society’s belief that male intimacy is the sole domain of gay dudes and become completely comfortable with embracing our friends in a way where we don’t care whether people think we’re gay or straight. That will also inevitably lead to the realization that the belief in “sexualization of male intimacy” as a problem is itself a product of that same dynamic we just deconstructed.


omg-sheeeeep t1_iue4i9x wrote

I absolutely agree with your take.

A big part of the problem is the constant quantifier of male friendships a la 'its not a gay thing but they hug a lot'. If we can just get rid of that kind of thinking then ultimately it won't matter whether it is or not.

And especially right now when more and more people speak out about how lonely they are I think it is important to embrace a dynamic that a lot of men especially only associate with romantic partners.