I’ll post it later. But I set myself on fire while holding a gasoline container. Being in the ocean felt like it was going to take me over time no matter what I did. Having my right arm in flames while trying to put out the fire felt like a bomb was going to blow up on me at any moment. And yes I was drinking again.

Don’t salute me yet, I only conquer it for months here and there before I relapse. I really hope I win this battle. There’s this phrase “the devil is doing push ups in the parking lot”, meaning that the disease never fades and weakens, it’s always just outside, getting stronger and stronger while it waits for you to slip up