Submitted by Botryoid2000 t3_11buojt in tifu

TIFU. I didn't mean to weld in the kitchen.

In an attempt to be healthy, I placed some beets in a steamer basket, put it in my big soup pot and put it on over high heat, figuring I would turn the heat down when it reached boiling.

I smelled something awful and thought "Damn, beets really do kinda stink."

Then I looked over to see a grey haze filling the kitchen and rolling into the living room.

I suddenly realized that I had put no water in the pot. What an idiot. I have no idea what was going on in my head, but I really fucked up.

Everything was burnt. I went over to pull the pot off the burner, but it was completely fused to the electric element.

I guess my Saturday errands will include going out to buy a new stove element, a new soup pot, and a new steamer basket.

TL;DR: I put beets on to steam with no water in the pot and welded the pot to the stove.



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physco219 t1_ja17qer wrote

Think positively, at least you didn't also burn the whole place down. I have seen that happen 1st hand. Source: Former Fireman.


ilhares t1_j9zxx11 wrote

Take that pot outside and get to work with a chisel and hammer. Keep it for the battle scars. :)


TuckerCarlsonsOhface t1_ja03fh8 wrote

Why TF do so many people decide to cook, put something on the stove, the go have a nice sit down in the other room? You realize the saying “a watched pot never boils” isn’t true, right? There is no “set it and forget it” in cooking.


alexanderpas t1_ja0i7os wrote

> There is no “set it and forget it” in cooking.

There is, it's called a slow cooker.


CorporateNonperson t1_ja0z5gi wrote

If only we had a pot that could compress slow cooking into an instant. Like a “Now Kettle” or “Snap Crock.”


Daveezie t1_ja117h6 wrote

Like a "Really Very Quick Cauldron"


NonfatNoWaterChai t1_ja1r9pv wrote

Instant Pot


CorporateNonperson t1_ja1rbka wrote

I think you might have a case of the whooshes


NonfatNoWaterChai t1_ja25pkx wrote

I figured that out right after I posted, but decided I would just leave it as evidence of my dummy-ness.


bazoril t1_ja3kv6n wrote

Ah, but he was definitely prepared to have the wooshes. He did instantly post his thoughts when he read your post.


BitterBloodedDemon t1_ja0aixv wrote

:/ ot OP, but I mean most of the stuff I cook doesn't need constant attention. Might as well sit down if I'm just going to spend 15 minutes staring into the abyss anyway.

It's not Hell's Kitchen. There isn't a string of things coming in and going out LOL.


wewora t1_ja18w8g wrote

I mean, putting something in the oven that's going to cook for a few hours is different than leaving something on the stove on high. Even if it's simmering on low, at least be in the same room so you can see or hear if something goes wrong.


BitterBloodedDemon t1_ja19o3n wrote

Most all of my kitchens have been almost directly attached to my living rooms.

I cook most things on medium, and can hear if, like, a pot is spilling over or smth.

Should OP have put something on high? No. Ofc not. But sitting in the other room while something is boiling or something for a bit isn't the crime this guy is making it out to be.


Rejusu t1_ja58xlz wrote

Some stuff I've done on a low stove has been on there for up to eight hours. I check the water level periodically but I'm not sitting in the kitchen for eight hours.


TuckerCarlsonsOhface t1_ja0dznb wrote

One would think boiling beets didn’t need to be monitored either, but here we are. As someone who has worked in multiple kitchens, and cooks almost every night, I hope you never have to eat those words.


ThornaBld t1_ja183nj wrote

Not a very good cook if you feel the need to stand over the pot the entire time instead of preparing the rest of the meal or anything, guessing nothing ever gets out at the same time in your kitchen, or half the food is cold


TuckerCarlsonsOhface t1_ja1w0fi wrote

Why wouldn’t I prepare the rest of the meal? I said don’t go chill on the couch in another room when you’ve got something on the stove, but I guess you needed an easy way to try and insult me for no reason.


BitterBloodedDemon t1_ja11ubx wrote

So salty. Ofc you'd be a cook.

> I hope you never have to eat those words.

Thanks, I already paid my dues. Caught my burners on fire, heated the oil so high it smoked (wrong burner).

I'm glad you have the time, energy, training, and vigilance to stand over your stove until everything is cooked to immaculate perfection. I hope you never falter or make mistakes. ;)


AproblemInMyHead t1_ja0govy wrote

Yo it fkn happens. People have lives that can easily distract them like a single mom trying to cook while the kids are running around. "Why TF..." because everyone is human


MightyKrakyn t1_ja0terr wrote

I just made carnitas yesterday where they simmer for nearly 3 hours. I’m assuming you’re just ignorant


BirdyDevil t1_ja11h9r wrote

Ron Popeil would definitely tell you otherwise.


Botryoid2000 OP t1_ja18e57 wrote

Oh, please. There is nothing about steaming beets that requires attending to UNLESS YOU FORGET THE WATER LIKE AN IDIOT.

I cook every day (I don't buy much prepared food and rarely eat out) and generally have a pretty good grip on what requires my attention and what doesn't.


TuckerCarlsonsOhface t1_ja1vm5p wrote

The fact that you melted metal means you left that alone for way too long, and if you’d monitored it, or at least set a timer to check it after a few minutes as one should do for anything on the stove, you’d have noticed there was no water well before it got so bad.


SubstantialEase567 t1_ja0fsg0 wrote

That was my favorite cigarette of the day, when prep is done and supper is cooking. I still miss that cigarette!


ohleprocy t1_ja1bxju wrote

What is the timer for then?


TuckerCarlsonsOhface t1_ja1v5ls wrote

Thats my point, you have to keep track somehow, you can’t just throw something on the stove and walk away.


Uptown_NOLA t1_ja1fa7h wrote

Yeah, I simply have to set the timer on my phone for the moment I want to check it, or I would be op on this thread.


Rejusu t1_ja58g2r wrote

There's no set it and forget it. But there's plenty of things that don't require regular attention that enable you to go do other things around the house. Slow cookers, long roasts in the oven, smoking meats on the BBQ, long simmers on the stove. I make Christmas pudding most years and the recipe I use involves steaming the pudding for eight hours to cook it initially. Like fuck am I standing in the kitchen for eight hours watching a pudding steam. I get it going and then set an alarm to check on the water level periodically so it doesn't boil dry.

All that said I don't understand how people can't stay in the kitchen long enough to get a pot boiling. Or think they can leave anything going at high heat unattended for very long.


TuckerCarlsonsOhface t1_ja6i6q5 wrote

I get that, but I was just talking about cooking on the stovetop, and even those times where you have something simmering forever, like making a stock, you use timers or something to monitor, and check on it before it melts metal to the stove as in the op.


averioste t1_ja303qb wrote

Ever heard of braising?


TuckerCarlsonsOhface t1_ja3ydtd wrote

Ever hear of a timer? My point is you don’t leave it alone long enough to fuse metal without some way to keep track.


Playful_Branch_5643 t1_ja0iljc wrote

I was steaming beets and the water all boiled away. Ruined the basket and pan. House stunk for days.


TheBubbleSquirrel t1_ja2dxfk wrote

Did this with cauliflower about 8 years ago. I can still remember the smell and have hardly cooked cauliflower since!


Playful_Branch_5643 t1_ja3gt0r wrote

Omg… cooked cauliflower is not the best smell, I can’t imagine burned cauliflower 🤢


Zahrad70 t1_ja1eqpv wrote

Lemons and lemonade, my friend. I look forward to your “forged in the kitchen” cooking/blacksmithing reality game show.


Marcos340 t1_ja35950 wrote

When I read the title I first thought it would be someone using a welder in the kitchen and the sparks ruining the floor or another furniture.


ThadisJones t1_ja46rvl wrote

In 2004 or so when I was a college student living in a studio apartment, I was working on a project over the winter break and wanted to heat treat some small titanium parts. The college's metal shop was closed for the break, so I decided to do it with a torch in my kitchen. The ventilation was not adequate and I gave myself metal fume flu, making myself really sick for two days. 1/10 got real sick, would not recommend (but the finish on my parts turned out sick (the other kind of sick))


alexanderpas t1_ja0ib8z wrote

Since you're cooking on electric already, get an induction furnace.