Submitted by pepper-annarchy t3_11c1nnj in tifu
I think I fucked up a good thing. This happened about 3 hours ago. I've (f31) been seeing Simon (m31) for a little over a month. We've been taking things slow, partially because of living situations, so we'd only had sex once before and, besides that one time, the rest of our dates have been in public.
Today I finally got my place to myself and invited him over for dinner. We didn't even make it to dinner before we were in the bedroom going at it like horny teenagers. When all was said and done, we realized the condom had slipped off at some point and he'd finished inside me.
A couple of weeks ago, I had a papsmear that came back abnormal. This meant my abusive ex had given me HPV and it may have caused cervical cancer. I have an appointment to have a colposcopy done to find out if it's cancer. I hadn't discussed this with Simon yet. I should have before we had sex, and I know that I fucked up.
Simon was worrying about Plan B, but I knew I had to tell him about his exposure. I blurted it out and things changed drastically. He excused himself to the bathroom for a while. When he came back, he started getting dressed. He gave me money for the Plan B and held me for a few minutes before leaving. Before he left, he said he needed to think things through because this was a big red flag, but if he expected openness from me, he felt like he should be honest about his own red flags.
I feel terrible for not having told him beforehand. While he seemed to have taken it better than I deserve, I still feel ashamed and I don't know if he can forgive me.
TL;DR I didn't tell my partner about having HPV until after the condom came off during sex.