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cybercount t1_jdlrrzp wrote

No more talking. Accept that he is ok. Suggesting a meeting would only be for your sake and he might feel obligated because of you work relationship.

21

ImBehindYou6755 t1_jdlrtbm wrote

Wow. You nailed the terrible person part.

This isn’t a “next team meeting” kind of thing. As far as I’m concerned, it would make a disgusting situation even worse both professionally and for your family’s sake if you failed to immediately remove yourself from that environment.

You cannot continue to interact with an affair partner (yes, I’m calling him that) on account of BOTH of those spheres of your life. Step down, get out of there, find a new job.

How to address this with your family is above my paygrade as far as I’m concerned, but the longer you continue to interact with that man, the worse handling this will become.

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LostMyBunty t1_jdlv9gj wrote

Truelove cannot be denied, cannot be broken. A BJ isn't cheating anyway.

−8

Okimiyage t1_jdlwkdk wrote

Why do you seem more upset about how this colleague feels, over what you’re potentially doing to your family.. and to his family too?

If you can’t even spare a sentence to cover how what you’ve done and are obsessing about will effect them, then you’re too far gone to give advice to.

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flizargnark t1_jdm3mxm wrote

You're more worried about your coworkers finding out than you are your husband.

Get therapy and at the very least come clean to your husband.

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ilp456 t1_jdm3s60 wrote

You want to meet up again because you want this to go farther, despite what you are telling yourself.

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ThadisJones t1_jdmk4ps wrote

Every time I've thought of something like this I also think "this is literally a thing my employer pays me a lot of money not to do"

1

Drgnmstr97 t1_jdmldw7 wrote

Instead of planning to meet up with Mike you should admit what you did to your husband and try and work through this to save your marriage.

You won’t, but that is what you should do.

People in happy marriages don’t kiss other people. That kiss wasn’t “out of the blue”, it never is. And wanting to meet up with him is just going to end up in sex or crossing another line that you shouldn’t. You’re not clueless, you absolutely know how this is going to go and you are setting yourself up to progress the affair while telling yourself you won’t. Get yourself into therapy at the very least. Hopefully your therapist can figure out what is wrong with you and get you started down the path of fixing yourself. The only way out of this without destroying two families and many more other people is to admit to your husband what you did and get into therapy. It’s highly likely you will need to quit that job as well. And because all of that is SO much harder than just carrying on and falling into the affair that is what you will choose. Your poor husband and kids are going to be blindsided. I hope you make the right choice.

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Drgnmstr97 t1_jdmmiac wrote

Replying to [deleted] (#2,350,566)

Very odd that I can see the OP responded to this reply on her page in her comment section but I cannot see the comment on this post. Does anyone know why that is? When I click on her comment to read it, it takes me to this reply but her reply isn’t visible?????

And even more strange is that I cannot see my reply to this comment on the OP, but if I go to Keri’s-1’s page and click on his comment I can see my reply but still can’t see OP’s reply. What the hell???

1

Drgnmstr97 t1_jdmnkxm wrote

Replying to [deleted] (#2,353,785)

I’ve noticed it but I never bothered to try and find out why until today. What is wrong with Reddit? Is this some intentional thing that Reddit does or some weird thing that happens and hasn’t been fixed by them?

1

shesavillain t1_jdn4l92 wrote

Man, what a plot twist. I’m over here laughing until I read you’re both in relationships! And no, don’t end up alone with him to “talk” about it.

1