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Comments
Lokivstheworld t1_jea2tyc wrote
If he reaches out to you, you'll know it was meant to be. Or he's horny.
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jea2wcn wrote
I have an android and the number/text thread would usually be sent to the "recycling bin" but I deleted them from there too and apparently didn't have them backed up, so yeah, I was stupid.
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jea2ywv wrote
Hopefully the first one...
caedriel t1_jea2yzl wrote
How did you get this persons number ?
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jea37dc wrote
I gave him my number and he text me from that so I don't have his anywhere, didn't even write it down to spite myself like I usually would
caedriel t1_jea3at1 wrote
How did you meet him ? Is there a way you could re meet him irl ?
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jea41n3 wrote
It was on a dating app, I think if I went and found him irl it would be a bit stalkery
caedriel t1_jea45pp wrote
Tinder ?if ya truly feel this way then it shouldn’t matter. You ain’t a stalker. Your just a person who’s looking for love!
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jea5qer wrote
Yeah, which he also deleted when we started talking... And maybe but it would still be a little weird if I just rocked up in his hometown trying to find him
Guyver2030 t1_jeamffd wrote
Look at tou phone statement, yout texts have numbers attached...
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeank75 wrote
I have never had a phone statement and wouldn't know how to get one
Guyver2030 t1_jeao12a wrote
You on monthly or payg??
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeaoeea wrote
Monthly contract, I tried to find it but all it comes up with is how many texts I've sent, no numbers
Guyver2030 t1_jeaorkj wrote
Should have an email, or login to your provider and look at a month you were texting and all the numbers you texted in that month should show up. Alternatively call your provider and query the texts sent and write down the numbers given compare to your address book. Also your Gmail will hold all contacts you have had
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeap9j2 wrote
I don't get emails, all the stuff for my contract is on the networks app so I can just check things through there. I looked for the specific months statement but like I said, it just said how many texts I'd sent.
dxlevnee t1_jeatnlj wrote
Reinstall. You'll still have the message history unless you asked.for your data to be deleted .same with Snapchat.
Whatve you got to lose by sending the message.
zorggalacticus t1_jeau29v wrote
Why not both?
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeaucml wrote
Reinstall what? I still have Snapchat, it's him that doesn't so even if I send a message to him there he won't see it
dxlevnee t1_jeaugs3 wrote
The dating app message him again. Even without the app sometimes you get emails.
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeauq1q wrote
Oh, he deleted his account on there so I can't message him on the dating app at all, his profile is gone. And I did try to add him on Snapchat hoping he'd see the "see who added you" email but I guess not
garry4321 t1_jeaxjqg wrote
Its likely to go better if you make him the second.
EtherealSai t1_jeb08eo wrote
I'm not gonna lie to you, you have issues that need to be worked out with a therapist if you are pushing people away and deleting all their info just because you are afraid they won't like you anymore. That would be like slicing off your fingertips because you're afraid of getting an ingrown nail.
I'm not saying this to make you feel bad or be mean, but you should really work through those before you try to date people.
thescrounger t1_jeb0oji wrote
These are getting worse and worse
justaeuropean t1_jeb1khs wrote
You know most people use the same or similar handles for different social media sites. Have you tried looking up his snapchat handle on other social media like Instagram, Facebook, tiktok, etc ?
Also, just like someone else said, this isn't a judgement but you should maybe go to therapy if you aren't already. Your reaction was really disproportionate to the situation.
It'll happen if it's meant to be :) good luck.
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeb1mat wrote
You're probably not wrong
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeb1ydv wrote
Yeah I thought of that and I'm aware of that too don't worry, I am very aware that I have some issues I need to work through. Thanks
Kwinza t1_jeb20f9 wrote
The fuck is a "enby"?
alan_alien t1_jeb252s wrote
Depends how far you are willing to go to get his number back. Each method below does get increasingly stalker'ish. So it's really up to you.
A phone professional could probably recover the text, unless your phone memory is maxed out and has been overwritten. A quick Google search on how to recover deleted texts on Android revealed a method involving a recycle bin built into the android text application. When deleting files, they are seldom permanently deleted, they are instead marked to be overwritten if your device needs the storage space.
If you have any pictures of his face, you can do a reverse Google image search and possibly find his Facebook or linked in profile or something... Or simply search for him on Facebook
If you know his name and town he lives in, or better yet, his favourite activities. You could phone a couple establishments near him and leave a message.
If you know where he works then could try that too. But don't straight up tell the receptionist your story, just ask if you can speak to Mr X. This is technically social engineering so choose your words wisely.
[deleted] OP t1_jeb272g wrote
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justaeuropean t1_jeb2lda wrote
You're welcome :) I hope everything works out for you
warriorofinternets t1_jeb450p wrote
What is enby?
stealpancak3s t1_jeb4osp wrote
I swear to god I have a similar (ish) story. I accidentally deleted this guy off Snapchat and he was so nice to me, and now I literally cannot find him anywhere else. I hope he reaches out to you!
tileman1440 t1_jeb4see wrote
It all depends on how committed you are.
You could contact your phone company and ask them to send you the call history that contains all the numbers used. They will have it and it will be there.
Ragnarotico t1_jeb4sxn wrote
He probably dodged a bullet. You're not in any state to date anyone.
"Really I was just worried that if we did meet he wouldn't like me anymore and I'd be let down like I have in the past "
If that's the thought process going through your head before you even go out on a date, you've got no business being out on the market.
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeb4vy3 wrote
Damn, I'm sorry that happened to you, shame you can't find him. And thank you!
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeb593y wrote
You're honestly probably not wrong, although I'm sure a lot of people have doubts before they go on dates. They're probably just not as reactionary as I was which is an issue all of its own anyway.
InsertKleverNameHere t1_jeb5u3e wrote
non binary i guess. had to look it up too
Ragnarotico t1_jeb689y wrote
No, honestly your thoughts are not normal or healthy. Feeling some nervousness before a date is normal.
Normal thoughts are "does my hair look good, will they like my outfit, I hope I don't talk too much, etc."
Your thoughts are "this person probably isn't going to like me and I'm going to be let down like the past".
Normal people have some trepidation on what is to come, but they still go on a date.
You have these intrusive/harmful thoughts that are indicative of something deeper seeded that you might want to figure out or talk to a therapist about. It's not just mere thoughts. It's also affected your actions which is really extreme.
You've provided no indication that this person was anything less than friendly/respectful. To delete someone's number entirely is a very strong reaction to... really nothing at all. Unless he was texting you dick and butthole pics or saying disgusting things, I don't see why you would delete the text thread either.
PotatoOver9759 t1_jeb6htm wrote
Life lessons be painful so hopefully you don't forget them again down the line. Hopefully it goes better with the next one
PotatoOver9759 t1_jeb6sq5 wrote
This is such sage advice. Please get therapy for your past trauma so you don't end up doing these kind of things again.
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeb773a wrote
Honestly I don't think there'll be a next one, not for quite a while anyway.
Mrbiggz32 t1_jeb7b7b wrote
Right! they need the precursor of the 2nd to facilitate the 1st lol
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeb7o3x wrote
No I see your point, the way I was thinking ultimately made me mess up the entire thing and I won't be looking to date anyone again any time soon. No point putting anyone else through that again, at least not until I figure out my own issues around dating. And no, he was actually really nice and very confident about the entire thing whereas I was not clearly.
SkyrimIsForTheNerds t1_jeb84aw wrote
They could be ace or greysexual.
MaxG623 t1_jeb9bb7 wrote
Phonetic pronunciation of "NB", meaning Non-Binary; Someone who doesn't identify strictly as a man or woman.
anonymouss2012 t1_jeb9igu wrote
If you have verizon, you certainly can get your numbers that come and go..
[deleted] OP t1_jeb9kda wrote
[deleted]
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jeb9q7x wrote
I'm not even sure if we have that network in the UK...
catscausetornadoes t1_jebb2gk wrote
Depending on your phone situation, his number might be on your old phone bills.
Epinier t1_jebbmbi wrote
Seriously? Such a bad advice. I'm sorry officer, I'm standing in front of this person window only because I'm looking for love...
Dalolfish t1_jebe3ws wrote
What is enby?
Puffena t1_jebewl4 wrote
Why is this downvoted? It’s a reasonable possibility, no?
SkyrimIsForTheNerds t1_jebf1g7 wrote
Probably feels too “woke” to assholes.
izzytakamono t1_jebfvnj wrote
Both of those things are not mutually exclusive and the second one isn’t bad by default
trvllvr t1_jebfxob wrote
Oh they are definitely right. You need to see someone to work on your insecurities. They will continue to ruin any possible relationship if you don’t.
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jebg1ba wrote
I didn't say they were or that the second was bad, I just said hopefully the first
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jebg5b6 wrote
Yeah, as I've agreed with literally everyone who's said that already
trvllvr t1_jebg61r wrote
You have an account, login and view past bills. Or contact your carrier. They can provide it.
trvllvr t1_jebg9z9 wrote
Not sure where you are or who your carrier is, but contact them directly. They should be able to help, if you are really interested.
trvllvr t1_jebgfdo wrote
Well if you stopped talking, maybe he went back on the dating app. Doesn’t hurt to look.
Adaian5443 t1_jebhz0p wrote
Not sure how things work with your carrier, but I can log into my mobile account and get my call detail. If you can remember an exact time you spoke with him, then you could get the number.
CelebrationSevere199 t1_jebnw1u wrote
Well that's a you problem.
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jebo31c wrote
Well, yes...
S2Charlie t1_jebohdl wrote
TIL what enby means.
johcagaorl t1_jebpa1b wrote
Graysexual sounds like a kink for older people.
CRT74 t1_jebphf7 wrote
Why can't you go look at your phone bill? Does it not lust the numbers you've called or texted?
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jebpo1x wrote
It's not an itemised bill so all it shows is the amount of minutes and texts I've used, not the numbers I've rung or texted.
SilverLugia1992 t1_jebzywe wrote
Lol right?
armchairzero t1_jec0gca wrote
Enby 27?
I'm old an don't understand acronyms. English for the old folks, please.
dontlikedefaultsubs t1_jec0j58 wrote
A phonetic spelling of 'NB', an abbreviation of 'non-binary'
adzling t1_jec1uh7 wrote
ffs why not just say it...
Bi_Bibliophile t1_jec1x66 wrote
I am actually demisexual so you're not far off
patchinthebox t1_jecarix wrote
What exactly is NB? Honestly trying to learn. I really don't understand it. Is it like you identify as both male and female at the same time? Or neither? How can it be neither?
patchinthebox t1_jecbh9k wrote
Non binary. NB "enby".
[deleted] OP t1_jecfky9 wrote
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dontlikedefaultsubs t1_jechct4 wrote
I'm not trans so I can't speak for anyone who is, but as I understand it
-
maleandfemaleare biological terms so you can't really choose to be one or the other. The overwhelming number of people are exclusively one or the other. There are some rare cases of people who are biological both and some who are biologically neither. BUT -
Non-Binary can refer to an individual not identifying as
manorwoman, ormasculineorfeminine, which are societal constructs and malleable through time and geography. It's not something I fully understand but I don't understand Korean at all and I'm not about to say that language doesn't exist.
It's complicated and messy and something you'd be better off asking somewhere else
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bigpunk157 t1_jee273p wrote
Why is this even a thing?
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caedriel t1_jea2bn4 wrote
Are you on iOS ? If you are and iCloud is on you can check your contacts list on iCloud.com