This TIFU wasn't meant to invite those who get upset about how the meat was prepared (since that seems to be your focus).

In a way, you're staring at the birds at a fire-works show.

Your jump in question seems to go from how it was prepared to how military doesn't know what they are doing for some odd reason? What does that statement even have to do with anything? the military is made up of people who've come from all different walks of life to include college, McDonalds, or Highschool. We aren't just "created" with zero knowledge. It adds literally nothing, and you could've easily said:" Open flame. Probably washed it down with Johnny Walker blue mixed with some nice Sprite." and it would've made sense.

Edit:
I had to look Johnny Walker Blue up. No thanks.

This TIFU is not your enemy, so maybe just vibe like the rest of the comment section?