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Duffman66CMU t1_jdfy2te wrote

Reply to comment by Argenis_82 in TIFU by losing my temper at school by Madeline2535

Sure. She kicked a chair and laughed. Is that the same as punching in the face? Is this how we want to teach young people to react when someone annoys them?

Perhaps this young person could advocate for themself and move their chair out of reach. Perhaps they could consult the teacher. There are many other things that this student could have tried, but because they feel overwhelmed, they jumped right to the last resort.

That is where the principal’s coming from. Was what the other kid did wrong? Yes. Was it suspendable? No. Fighting is.

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Madeline2535 OP t1_jdfzche wrote

Maybe she should’ve left me alone

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Duffman66CMU t1_jdfztok wrote

Agreed! But if she doesn’t, then getting yourself in trouble shouldn’t be your go to solution.

If she doesn’t leave you alone, there are other options. She was totally wrong (and a jerk) for laughing and kicking your chair. You were also wrong for punching her.

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kakocastro t1_jdgce31 wrote

You clearly never had to deal with bullies yourself. It’s not just kicking the chair. It’s everything, the constant behaviour, the laughter, the jokes. And sometimes you can’t take it anymore. And today nobody can give a snack to a kid to teach them a lesson. Saying there are other solutions is unrealistic and only someone who has never been bullied believes it. Do you know what teachers did when I complained about being bullied? They talked with the bully. And it would work for a couple of days. The first time I fought back and knocked out one of them, I became the "dont fuck with him guy". its not up to OP to educate the bully. But it is up to OP to not let people fuck with her. I dont go around hitting people now at work. because I can reason with them. As a kid, bullies didnt understand reason. they understood getting their asses kicked.

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eivind2610 t1_jdh1q1u wrote

You're forgetting the key point that the other girl wasn't just being annoying - she was physically hurting OP. She was basically doing the same as what OP ended up doing, except for longer... and less visibly. And we haven't even begun to address the bullying aspect of it yet.

I agree with you that a punch to the face was taking things too far, but what the other girl did was also taking things too far in the first place. There's often not enough room to move the chair out of reach from someone sitting directly behind you, so that's not necessarily an option. And anyone who's ever dealt with bullying in school knows that if you take it to the teacher, a few things are going to happen: First of all, the bullying will only get worse - you 'snitched', so in the bullies' mind, you've shown you deserve it. Second, the teacher is more than likely going to either not do anything, or take the bully's side. There isn't necessarily a good way out of the situation OP was in.

All that being said - you're absolutely right that OP shouldn't have punched the other girl.

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Duffman66CMU t1_jdim5fu wrote

There are probably other recourses, and maybe the ones I mentioned don’t always work, but they do have the advantage of not screwing up OPs grades and home life.

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