No one should have to be a saint to put up with their partner. That’s abuse.

I appreciate what you did was a one off, but you called her unattractive in front of alllll your friends. I don’t see how her self esteem can come back from that, unless she’s from an abusive background where she’s been taught to swallow her own feelings for others’ comfort.

Time to either get into therapy, or take this stuff about mean girls to your grave. Preferably both.