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___Phreak___ t1_j1m9syh wrote

Are you sure he wasn't on the spectrum?

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RegretAccomplished16 t1_j1mg75y wrote

As someone who is on the spectrum, I couldn't help but laugh that OP doesn't think his dad is autistic at all

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___Phreak___ t1_j1mhrxz wrote

Same, and I'd be surprised that the presents weren't appreciated

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Smirkydarkdude t1_j1m9zht wrote

Mmm.. no. I guess I'm not sure.

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ThrobbinGoblin t1_j1myi05 wrote

I'm pretty sure that autism of some sort runs in the men in my family because they are all like this, and nowadays if I take a psychological test they see it in me. I think that the only difference is that they didn't test for it or really know much about it back then, so men just had to mask their entire lives and deal with it or die single and childless.

I know this because when I was growing up it wasn't really a well tested for thing and I had to mask. And OPs story sounds like something I would do.

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chantendo64 t1_j1nkqgy wrote

I think there’s also something to be said for it going on for generations and that being the normal for the family. My boyfriend and his dad act so similarly in some ways. Early on in our relationship I very gently suggested to him I thought he might have autism and he didn’t believe me at first because of how his dad acts and that that was their family’s normal. He ended up getting tested and was diagnosed. So I think along with the lack of testing there’s also a component of not thinking that testing is needed.

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Adjectivenounnumb t1_j1nu7hw wrote

Corollary: I didn’t realize until I was an older teen that having people come to your house to buy drugs from your parents wasn’t normal.

(Thanks, dad!)

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ThrobbinGoblin t1_j1o6ost wrote

Dude, it's pretty normal. At least in America.

I mean... Isn't it? At least like weed or mushrooms at some point if you're in the midwest. Unless your parents are the most super conservative people or they didn't have you until they were in their thirties. At least in my experience there's a good proportion of them that at least dabbled.

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Adjectivenounnumb t1_j1o7slz wrote

It was the 80s and it was cocaine and crack. :/

My father eventually ended up in federal prison for trafficking. (Yes trafficking, so bigger quantities.)

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ThrobbinGoblin t1_j1p61wg wrote

Oh yeah, that's rough. Sorry about that. All my family members only grew and sold weed back in the day, and smoked the crack. Not well off enough to traffick or do coke 😅

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lolatu54 t1_j1myfu3 wrote

They didn't have a spectrum back then. He was just considered eccentric 😂

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BananaGarlicBread t1_j1nn8bc wrote

Right on. I'm 99% positive my dad is autistic (as sure as someone who isn't a professional can be), but back in the day if you were verbal and relatively high functioning you weren't "autistic", just quirky or eccentric.

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Robobvious t1_j1mpci8 wrote

If the spectrum goes from no autism to all the autism then everyone’s on it somewhere, lol.

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BouncingDancer t1_j1mqxyx wrote

Probably some autism to all the autism.

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uhrilahja t1_j1mx49v wrote

Yes. If someone's not autistic, they're not on the spectrum. It's a spectrum within autism, that includes people with different needs and strengths!

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Valalvax t1_j1mxosk wrote

Yea, it's not even like a sliding scale chart, more like one of those 4 quadrant graph things

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uhrilahja t1_j1nqb1v wrote

Indeed. Not "more" or "less" as the extreme options.

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Xrgonic369 t1_j1mz1i6 wrote

“Spectrum” is a poor word because it implies a number line type deal, ranging from “not autistic” to “extremely autistic.” It’s more like a color wheel, where each color represents a symptom, and each color can be thought of as its own number line, where each autistic has more or less of each individual symptom. I am autistic.

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individualizada t1_j1n1q9d wrote

No it doesn’t work like that at all, thank you very much. I get that your comment wasn’t meant with bad intentions but it is misinformation.

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Robobvious t1_j1ozzvw wrote

I’d call it a joke but misinformation is certainly accurate too so fair enough.

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Flat_Cod_747 t1_j1nq8as wrote

“Ofc everyone have money, money is a number and 0$ is a number!”

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