TIFU by wearing a T-shirt to a restaurant

Submitted by JustSpeaker208 t3_10ow7o1 in tifu

I'm writing this hours after it happened and after laughing about the situation to my parents. But I still wanted to share it through here for your entertainment 😂

I (21F) was out with my guy friend, let's call him Dave (22M, almost 23), treating ourseleves to a shopping spree as a birthday celebration (his birthday is tomorrow). His mom texted him while we were out and told her what he was doing and who was with him and asked me if i wanted to come to his birthday dinner with him, his mom and his uncle. Since I had no other plans other than staying home with my parents, i decided to go!

While we were at the mall, i tried to look for tops more nice as i was informed that i might want to change shirts. i was wearing a cropped sweater and tried to look for nicer blouses and such, but nothing stood out. Plus, i wanted to treat myself still to clothes i actually like and wear. In the end, i got to graphic t-shirts i liked, and after i purchased them, I and dave headed to his mom's.

Once we got to his mom's, i changed my top to one of the shirts I bought (it was an oversized purple graphic tee) and asked dave if he thinks this would be okay to wear based on where we were going. He said "yeah you should be fine. dont worry." and considering he was also wearing a new t-shirt he got from our shopping trip and describes the restaurant as a steakhouse, i decided not to worry.

His uncle drove to the restaurant and once we get there, i knew instantly that i had fucked up. Saying this place was fancy is an understatement, and me wearing a t-shirt made me feel even more overwhelmed than i already was. Compared to how others were dressed, i felt like i looked like a homelese person.

Luckily, his uncle guided me through the menu, which was like 5 courses, and I picked the items i knew i would be the most comfortable eating since there were things on the menu i know are pricey and didnt want to raise the bill more and food items that i have only heard about in movies where they treat a loved one to a fancy restaurant. I did make the best of it by talking to Dave and his family and even tucked in my shirt to make it look more nice. Dave kept joking "oh do you feel anxious for how underdressed you feel?" and i laughed saying "you had to remind me just as soon as i forgot. well, at least i did makeup today, so...i look nice on that end" which got a laugh from the whole table. Dinner was indeed fantastic, and i did have a good time with Dave and his family.

But note to self: DONT TAKE FASHION TIPS FROM DAVE (love the guy, but man, did i wish i stayed in my sweater😂) and i will now pack an extra outfit in case something like this happens again!

TL;DR TIFU by changing my shirt for my friend's birthday dinner

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Scarecrow314159 t1_j6h65gs wrote

Reminds me of the time my parents said I could wear jeans and a button shirt to a semi formal event... except.. when I showed up, everyone was wearing suits and ties. I stuck out like a sore thumb and I felt really self conscious for it.

Good on you for just rolling with it and even turning it into a laugh for everyone, that was definitely the best strategy there. They won't remember you as underdresser, they'll remember you as funny and charismatic :)

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Archelon_ischyros t1_j6jzdvl wrote

I hate that feeling.

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Scarecrow314159 t1_j6kmwsu wrote

I wish I played it cool like OP here, because I kind of just withdrew and stayed really quiet, trying to avoid being noticed, which made me stand out more in hindsight... if I just laughed it off, no one would have cared, but because I cared, others did too

Some friends really made an effort to try to make me feel better but all the extra attention didn't help

I wish I could foresee that at the time lol it's really obvious to me now

Thank you for the empathy though, it does help to know it happens to others as well

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Aggressive-Donkey845 t1_j6hbj7s wrote

A lot of rich people underdress. Too rich to care lol

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Roger-Roo t1_j6hd998 wrote

So true! Lol. One of my closest friends is literally a millionaire and he always looks homeless hahaha

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6iks3g wrote

lol dave and his mom are not rich, but his uncle is which is why they can go to this place every year since he was 12! but i do agree with what you meant in your comment😂 made me laugh

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ButtFucksRUs t1_j6jz07q wrote

Yup. I was at a nice hotel off Rodeo Drive and the front desk people were making a fuss. I kept hearing the word "heiress" thrown around.

This girl around the age of 17 shows up in ripped jeans, dirty converses, a graphic tee, a hoodie, and a tattered backpack.

If it weren't for the group of 5 people milling about her I would have had no idea. Somebody was getting her checked in, another person was going upstairs to make sure her room was set up properly, another person was on their cellphone saying that she had arrived, and then two other people were just hanging out in the background.

I guess there is some merit to the adage "money talks, wealth whispers."

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Whoaitsjulie t1_j6h675o wrote

LOL. Definitely can’t trust Dave. Good job making it through!

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6h6cdk wrote

Lol yep! luckily, i was wearing really cute boots, straightened my hair today, and did my makeup. plus his mom was assuring me that i looked fine and i had nothing to worry about, so that was nice

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[deleted] t1_j6h909s wrote

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6h97ii wrote

i tried my best to make it that way so i could make my anxieties settle down by just enjoying the moment in celebrating my friend's birthday 😊

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Waerok t1_j6hp3c0 wrote

Lol I've definitely done this. Was on a trip with fam and I was a bit underdressed than them because I thought we'd just be walking around DC anyway. Got hungry but all restaurants around us were booked -- until we found one with accommodation.

Unfortunately, our hunger got ahead of us and we didn't even bother to check the menu first. It was a fancy ass restaurant. An appetizer costs as much as a main dish at your typical $$ or even $$$ places. Not sure why we didn't leave when we could... maybe we felt bad since the servers were already giving us their best service, and we were already settled in at the middle-ish part of the restaurant.

I couldn't take off my winter jacket or else I'd look like an idiot with a graphic t-shirt with a huge image of ramen. My family was fine and their outfits fit in well despite being casual. I felt crappy the whole dinner, and we were out $250 while not even being full at the end.

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6ilp8o wrote

oof! that sounds more rough than what I went through. but just like you, the staff was super nice, which helped me forget about what I was wearing. gotten love kind servers that help us through these rough times🥰

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heyitsvonage t1_j6hyy0c wrote

Dave just knows how the richest people actually dress lol

He went with the old Mark Cuban t-shirt lol

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professionalmeangirl t1_j6hcy09 wrote

suuuuuper common boy doesn't listen problem; had this happen multiple times in my teens/early 20s with dudes before realizing it was a culture problem.

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6ilci9 wrote

lol yep, which is why ill say again...DONT TAKE FASHION ADVICE FROM DAVE 🤣🤣🤣

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OkVolume1 t1_j6hj6wf wrote

Dave is the real author of the FU.

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MrMisties t1_j6j8qho wrote

So is Dave in the friendzone or is he actually chill

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6j9fmh wrote

i just had someone ask me this through PM, and with that I'll tell you through here too that Dave and I are casually seeing each other (aka a situationship). we've been friends for 4 years and have had on and off feelings for each other for a while too. We officially flipped the switch in May of 2022, and we are happy with how we are doing things considering our busy schedules! hope this clears some stuff up 😊😆

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bros402 t1_j6jb1wv wrote

You probably looked really rich to the people there - everyone knows the rich people underdress to fancy places

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6jbd10 wrote

😂😂😂 if this is true, then this makes me feel a whole lot better as i was worried that i was eating with the wrong fork while also worried about my outfit! thank you for this comment, i needed this ☺️

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AcrobaticSource3 t1_j6jcivr wrote

Tell Dave I said happy birthday!

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6jcsxt wrote

awww lol i will! im seeing him again today with his best friend at disneyland so ill make sure to bring it up 😂

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ThadisJones t1_j6iilie wrote

I just attended a funeral on Saturday where my parents assured me it was going to be a casual event and that I could dress casually.

It was very much NOT a casual dress event and although I hate wearing a suit coat at least I had the foresight to bring it, and wear a button down shirt and nicer pants.

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6ilzcj wrote

good on you for planning ahead in case the outcome wasn't what you were told it was going to be! definitely going to be doing this more with dave in the near future 🤣

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Kcirnek_ t1_j6isv5f wrote

Rich people where whatever they want, anywhere they want. T-shirt included. So you should not feel bad at all.

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6iv4wx wrote

lol its his uncle thats rich, but i appreciate the sentiment and the assurance in your comment😊

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that-dudes-shorts t1_j6k0ap3 wrote

If Dave has been going to this place since his 12th birthday and teased you throughout dinner...Dave definitely set you up lol

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6lqyqx wrote

felt like more of a test, but i think i passed as he said how proud he was of me for how handled that as he knows i get anxious about a lot of things. plus was happy i was able to get along with his mom and uncle so bonus points for me😉😅

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Eas_Mackenzie t1_j6k6p4n wrote

I once went with my now common law and his parents to Arizona (we live in canada). They have a vacation house down there and go twice a year. His uncle, also has a vacation home down there in Scotsdale. (The rich part I didn't know)

While we are in Arizona, we get an invitation to go for pizza with his aunt and uncle (who i hadnt met yet). I'm used to 10-20°C so the 50°C of Arizona was killing me. For pizza, I thought short shorts, flip flops and a baggy graphic t-shirt would be a good outfit.

I should have taken cues from bfs mom and dad who wore nicer than their usual vacation clothes and my bf and his brother wore button up shirts (my bf always does so not weird for him)

We get to the restaurant and I knew I messed up. It was FANCY PIZZA. THE TYPE WHERE THEY HAVE THEIR MICHELLIN STARS ON THE WALL.

Uncle was in a suit and aunt was wearing a womens business suit.

I didn't realize we were meeting the rich family and I look homeless. We sit down and waiters in suits attend to us. His aunt slides an envelope across the table to my bf and says "sorry we were in Greece for your birthday, here's something to make up for it" $1000 check. (They have kids and grandkids, the nephews aren't replacement kids) meanwhile I've never seen that much money at one time (at the time)

Then uncle starts talking about his various businesses and investment accounts

I have since seen them many times in appropriate attire and they now I'm not a homeless person he found on the street but damn that was scary

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6kpex0 wrote

yikes! this sounds intense! but glad you were able to get through it like i did!

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scrubZ0 t1_j6kpx9n wrote

My friends and I attended one of our friends graduations, and he assured us that casual wear would be perfect for the event. We thought it sounded odd but trusted him, as he was the one graduating. So I arrive in a T shirt and baggy jeans, the rest of us also in jeans or shorts with plain T shirts, and everyone else there is in a suit or dress. Ill never forgive him

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JustSpeaker208 OP t1_j6kq18f wrote

ahhhh friends am i right?! you love them, but sometimes you shouldn't listen to everything they tell you 😂

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tasKinman t1_j6hj3gu wrote

Just remember: you can never be overdressed.

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ArsonicForTheSoul t1_j6ienco wrote

I feel like a tux at the local pool might be a bit overdressed.

But I'm poor, so what do I know.

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