Honestly I say it because I'm clueless and also just awkward-- like I'm fine with small talk and lighthearted joking, or discussing difficult things with close friends. If we're friendly but you're not super close/someone I pretty much consider family basically, then I won't know what you want unless you give me a hint (or say outright), and the more tragic or difficult your situation, the more awkward I'll feel, and the more likely I'll act awkward, muck it up guessing and/or end up saying something that offends you accidentally in the process due to me feeling awkward overriding my ability to human. Just tell me if there's anything imminent, text me if you think of something, text me if you wanna vent, but otherwise I'll assume you wanna be left alone and don't want me making things more complicated for you.