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Blumoon73 t1_iuvpx5k wrote

Yeah man kill the heathens and as I Brit I demand compensation from all Scandinavians for coming over here and doing my great great great etc etc grandma, unless of course it turns out I actually have Viking ancestors in which case all's fair in love and war!

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aaronwcampbell t1_iuvu1sq wrote

"Everyone said I was daft to hide my army a swamp, but I did it all the same, just to show them. They drowned in the swamp. So I conscripted a second army. They drowned in the swamp. So I conscripted a third. They tried to run away, fell over, then drowned in the swamp. But the fourth one got back out and ran to join the Viking army. The Vikings thought it was an attack and fought, but my army just smashed them and kept running."

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Banea-Vaedr t1_iuvte4e wrote

A classic British battle tactic that the Romans would often complain about.

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Major_Lennox t1_iuvzuiq wrote

> [The Britons] inhabit wild and waterless mountains and desolate and swampy plains, and possess neither walls, cities, nor tilled fields, but live on their flocks, wild game, and certain fruits; for they do not touch the fish which are there found in immense and inexhaustible quantities. They dwell in tents, naked and unshod, possess their women in common, and in common rear all the offspring. Their form of rule is democratic for the most part, and they are very fond of plundering; consequently they choose their boldest men as rulers.

> They can endure hunger and cold and any kind of hardship; for they plunge into the swamps and exist there for many days with only their heads above water, and in the forests they support themselves upon bark and roots, and for all emergencies they prepare a certain kind of food, the eating of a small portion of which, the size of a bean, prevents them from feeling either hunger or thirst. *

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piles_of_anger t1_iuwgqyp wrote

While in the swamp he also got yelled at by a woman for letting oatcakes get burned that he agreed to watch.

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boomstickbutcher t1_iuw0tid wrote

Alfred the Great is truly a great monarch…. Do you how was ranked last, as far as monarchs…. Richard the Goatfucker.

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marmorset t1_iuw5o66 wrote

"The Great Heathen Army" was led by Ivar the Boneless and his brothers. The reason for his nickname is unclear. We know he couldn't walk, he was carried everywhere on a shield. He's described as being very tall and very wise.

It could be he just couldn't walk or had a leg deformity. Normally he would have been killed at birth, but his father was (possibly) Ragnar Lodbrok*, a king.

There have been people who are have a condition that makes them extremely tall, but who can't walk without leg braces, so that's a possibility.

Some suspect he might have had Osteogenesis imperfecta or "brittle bone disease."

Ivar, it was said, had "no love lust" in him, which people equate to impotence, but he did produce several children. The Norse were big on nicknames, some truthful, some ironic, it's hard to know what they meant.

Ivar and his family were the focus of the show Vikings, but that was completely fictional and even its references to real-life events were changed dramatically. Ivar is portrayed very negatively, his actual reputation was mixed. Obviously the Anglo-Saxons were not fans, but in Scandinavia he was either loved and admired or thought cruel and mean. Everyone agrees he was extremely smart.

​

*Ragnar Lodbrok (his surname was probably Sigurdson, Lodbrok, or Loðbrók**, was a nickname. His nickname, "hairy breeches" or "shaggy pants" came from the story where Ragnar battled a dragon and wore special clothing for protection.

**The ð letter was called an "eth" an was pronounced like the TH sound in "this" or "path." The Norse god Odin's name was actually Oðin.

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Bo-Shrewsy t1_iuxnpoe wrote

Odin wzs Othin???? This revelation completely distracts me from everything you said. It's like giving an hour long lecture on Constantine the great, and at the end, very abruptly, irrelevantly, and life-changingly just going "oh yeah, and Jesus's actual name was Larry"

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marmorset t1_iuy2pe9 wrote

It's like Odin with a lisp, it's hard getting used to. The ð looks like a d so very often it was just translated to d, like in Odin or Miðgarðr becoming Midgard.

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Bo-Shrewsy t1_iuyf0ss wrote

Midgard is Mithgarth? Is every gard a garth? So like Asgarth?

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marmorset t1_iuzhhis wrote

Yes, gard is garðr. Ásgarðr and Miðgarðr.

Also, Jesus' actual name was Yeshua, which in Greek became Iēsoūs, and then Iesus in Latin, and finally Jesus in English. There's a slightly different version of the same name in the Bible, Yehoshua, but that came directly from Hebrew to English, we pronounce it Joshua.

In Greek however, it's the same name, there's no difference. And in English we'd pronounce Yeshua as Joshua as well if it hadn't gone through Greek and Latin first.

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Bo-Shrewsy t1_iv0c78g wrote

I knew about Yeshua, I'd looked it up at some point, but thanks for charting its transmutation. But I never looked up Odin, it never occured to me it could be that different seeings as how it came from the same language family.

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