I guess I would classify them as abnormally entitled behaviors? I worked in an EC center over a decade ago with 2-3 year olds. Sure, there was hitting and hoarding and all sorts of age appropriate-yet-maladaptive behaviors. I'm now subbing in a 4-5 year old class, and I'm seeing not just the aggression (that really should have been put in check by 3), but wildly age inappropriate aggression.

The other day, a 4 year old went up to another girl and declared her his girlfriend. She seemed on board enough to humor him, but then he wouldn't stop following her around. I waited on the primary teachers cue, who just said, "we don't do boyfriend and girlfriend here, just friends," and let it be, but the kid really persisted in invading her space. This went on until the point where she started saying, "no, stop, you're not my boyfriend." We were outside at this point, and he started grabbing her arm and yanking her towards him, until I went right up to his face, and pretty bluntly commanded him to let her go, saying "what did she just tell you?"

His eyes went as wide as saucers, and was in shock. Clearly no adult in his life had ever told this kid what he can't do to another person, and he ran off crying. I explained to him after why he had to respect other kids boundaries, and he seemed receptive, but I was left pretty stunned to see a 4 year old do that.

That's the most shocking example, but there is a pervasive attitude of (mostly the boys) that they are in charge. Maybe I'm sensitive to this kind of thing, but if that's now normal, I don't want my kid anywhere near it lol.