I ended up purchasing an EcoFlow House Kit (Independence 5kwh + smart dual fuel generator) due to the same issues you faced. I will eventually get a solar kit (any solar panels will work with the hub) but right now just the battery + generator is perfect.

Pros:

• it is a supported package deal so my GF can get help with it in case I get hit by a bus
• it supports solar (3x1800W arrays), Alternator, AC, and DC inputs
• the dual fuel generator is 1800W (so small) but will charge the 5kwh of batteries 4 times on a 20lb propane bottle

• you can use the generator as DC (and when connected this way the system turns the generator on and off as needed) or AC (which you can turn on via pull-cord, button on front, or phone app)
• I have an iotawatt monitoring system, so I measured my boiler + refrigerator and they use 2.5kwh per day, so (theoretically) if I turn off all the other circuits on battery I can have heat and food (in case the power goes out in the summer) for 2 days before I need to start the generator
• it has an app for phone as well as a plugged in console (which can be mounted well away from the setup)
• provides 120v AC and 12v/24v DC in its distribution panel
• alternative use in an RV or other vehicle
• expandable to support 240v and has an optional panel to connect to your house main panel to power whole house without wiring (I made a subpanel and powered that with this setup instead)

Cons:

• pricy, although I did get the package for $2500 off during their xmas sale a few weeks ago
• specialty cables between hub/battery and specialty connectors on hub for solar and ac/dc out

So far, super happy. Can send pics and more info if anyone likes. This is the kit I bought (without the discount, of course). I was going to get the basic 5kwh kit as I already had a tiny gas generator but due to the sale it was actually cheaper to buy the Independence kit + generator than the kit I actually wanted

Edit: here is a pic of the Grafana dashboard I made for my iotawatt monitor to help determine electricity usage