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on_duh_pooper t1_jdnzkyk wrote

I like that we've revolved back to 'trust me bro' stock tips on 4Chan. There may be hope for this place yet

472

dont_hate_scienceguy t1_jdpnkl9 wrote

I too worked at DB in Frankfurt on the 47th floor, next to the Bratwurst stand and down the hall from the beer tent. And I don't remember seeing this guy anywhere.

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wattwood t1_jdq8nyl wrote

So, short on Bratwurst?

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Lower_Ambition4341 t1_jdqba8g wrote

Long on the Bratwurst

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whboer t1_jdruxge wrote

Bratwursts are like the railroads. You can bet on any new fancy cool thing to replace them, but 30 years later you’ll find that their cagr has by far outpaced the broader market.

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RealMcGonzo t1_jdsmvgh wrote

I just drove by the HQ on Google Streets. Something is up, most def!

3

Melkorrrrrrrrr t1_jdomhgm wrote

The post is an obvious fake. I worked for DB in Frankfurt on the trading floor 18month in 2019 and trading etc is all concentrated inside DB Campus building which is 300 meters away from the HQ (the famous two towers). Thus i have no clue what kind of security wagie even works at the HQ. Unless he is working for building security and saw people booking the management floors for tomorrow

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OkBid71 t1_jdps49j wrote

I also worked at DB in the parking garage as a valet. I've not noticed anything odd other than the execs have switched their Bentleys for leather-clad gimp-pulled carriages to show their commitment to environmentalism.

Oh, and tomorrow's meeting is for the spring orgy, it shouldn't be anything surprising for anyone who's worked at this facility for more than one season.

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DaGleese t1_jdocb49 wrote

Germans are coming to work on Sunday?

Fuck this IS serious.

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Hoplertarum t1_jdob2da wrote

To discuss how to spend the bailout money guys, nothing to see here. Bullish 🥴

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qainin t1_jdocmaw wrote

Deutsche Bank is German.

They are under EU financial regulation that bans bailout.

That is stupid in my opinion, but the law is there.

If they try to use state or EU funds to rescue that bank, someone will sue, and it's headed for German constitutional court for the next ten years.

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Hoplertarum t1_jdodmqn wrote

Well, during COViD where these rules went out of the window and Lufthansa was essentially bailed out by German state.

When you have the president of the ECB on Friday essentially saying they will do anything to maintain ‘stability’, don’t blame me for being skeptical that they are not going to be bailed out.

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Mathiasdk2 t1_jdofpyc wrote

Not exactly true. It bans state-aid, but the state can lend them money, just like a lot of banks were saved during 2008/09, they just had to pay the loans back, or convert them to stocks at a favorable rate for the government.

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yldf t1_jdq8ukf wrote

They could also issue new stock for cheap that German government buys. They’ll probably be ok with 51% of voting power.

3

Easystius t1_jdpu5fx wrote

Bailout is a no-no-word now. Backstop it is.

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AdministrationNo4611 t1_jdpu9g2 wrote

Bank is failing, Germany makes new bank, uses people money to buy the failing back and everything that's toxic; Put's toxic waste of a bad bank and the good stuff stays in the new bank.

Here, that's how you bailout

7

Mundus6 t1_jdp5vmt wrote

They can still be bailed out by another bank.

5

Hodorous t1_jdq5vq5 wrote

Since when EU regulation has had effect on Germany/France? Greece pay debts since Hans needs bratwurst.

2

VisualMod t1_jdnu89l wrote

I am not surprised that Deutsche Bank is in trouble. They have been making bad decisions for years and their stock has reflected that. I don't feel sorry for them, they deserve what's coming to them.

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Darth_Cartsalot t1_jdodfy1 wrote

God damn lmao he's on a savage streak lately. VM has absolutely no chill.

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FreyBentos t1_jdon91a wrote

VisualMod has no chill, only cold, hard cutting financial opinion.

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Zwiebel1 t1_jdp57hh wrote

What they don't deserve is the tax-payers money. But we all know they are gonna get it anyways.

6

Rootilytoot t1_jdp1k8h wrote

Hey guys I am a member of the board of directors for Deutsche Bank and the parking lot security team is assembling tomorrow morning at 11am for an emergency meeting regarding not knowing a single thing that happens at a fucking multinational investment bank.

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Semi_Lovato t1_jdp6y6y wrote

My dad works at nintendo

23

chickinflickin t1_jdq4uyk wrote

My dad can beat up your dad

16

Buythembitches t1_jdqchkn wrote

My dad died in 2008

8

Big-Industry4237 t1_jdts9f2 wrote

My dad knows the CEO of SPY, he can confirm, meetings are happening, tomorrow, at company’s all around the world.

1

GorgeousMetal t1_jdoxfda wrote

I question the authenticity of this post and the veracity of its contents.

My homework assignment was to use "authenticity" and "veracity" in one sentence.

30

RushiPushi t1_jdp0z91 wrote

11 oclock for an emergency meeting lol I guess breakfast comes first. BULLISH

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tdatas t1_jdpric6 wrote

That's the convincing bit to me.

11

braiinfried t1_jdp7ky6 wrote

holy fuck its like that scene in margin call where everyone comes in for the panic meeting bc they overleveraged beyond the market value of the entire company

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Flipmode45 t1_jdpynkv wrote

At this point I’m fairly sure banks have been using that movie as a how to trade training video for the last decade, based on the number of banks that have got themselves deep in the shit.

8

nigerdaumus t1_jdo6eu6 wrote

Tha 4chan poster said the meeting was about borrowing 60b from the fed. Banks saved.

8

qainin t1_jdocare wrote

It's a German/British Hedgefund. Why would the fed save them?

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legbreaker t1_jdooi28 wrote

It happened in 2008 as well.

But mostly because Deutsche bank was in trouble from exposure to the US subprime loans. I guess they felt partially responsible

6

EnragedMoose t1_jdp3x98 wrote

It's because it's in US interest to not let the largest economy in the EU tailspin.

4

FleXXger t1_jdoqd79 wrote

Only 23 trillion? Wasn't it like 60 trillion in 2016 when everyone screamed about the "derivate bomb"? So it's down 50%, that's good, right?......RIGHT?

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NefariousnessNo5717 t1_jdq872d wrote

"Billionen" in German language means trillions, so pretty f*cked

3

FleXXger t1_jdqodgp wrote

Achja, die die Angelsachsen nennen die Zahlen ja wieder anders.

3

Significant-Ad3083 t1_jdpaoki wrote

Shit is about to hit the fan and scatter in all directions

3

euserc75 t1_jdpi0di wrote

But someone has to turn on the fan otherwise it just hits the fan and stays there

3

Sir_Lu t1_jdq8cmi wrote

Thing that makes this 100% believable is the meeting time! Asking people to come in only after church time on a Sunday.

Oho…anyone else hear those church bells ringing?

3

fiat_failure t1_jdpm4pb wrote

I’d be shocked if half the world’s banks aren’t getting bailed out by next month

2

Upper-Equivalent3651 t1_jdq2yos wrote

It is a wonder, DB still exists.

You know how many times DB was actually technically bancrupt? Yes, THAT often.

With that, I mean that any other company showing that balance sheet would be closed by force. IRA and Co. would laugh at you, if you tell them with a straight face "Nah, all good".

2

pmoO0 t1_jds52js wrote

I bought shares on Friday at 8,39 euro 💶 Nothing will happen to DB. it’s not a „german“ bank. It’s a European bank deeply embedded in Europe and operating globally. It was bad optics for Olaf Scholz to comment on the situation.
Everything will be fine in a few weeks.

2

VisualMod t1_jdnu7o3 wrote

User Report
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1

macems t1_jdpm12o wrote

Any ways to short the banking sector using a liquid etf with tight options spreads? Looking, but I haven’t found any yet

1

gavalo01 t1_jdq1870 wrote

god please let it be disastrous

1

BlueBird1800 t1_jdq5lde wrote

Hey guys, I work in the building next to DB and ran into the Director at a redlight heading into work. I got him to roll his window down. He told me they've made a killing off of the calls they sold against themselves. They are going to start doing puts as the "bailouts" start rolling in. He did express his gratitude for the everyday man bailing them out of this situation; he's going to pour a drink in our honor when he's on his yacht next time.

1

Ok_Owl_6625 t1_jdqde9a wrote

Oh boy, looks like I need to look for a job :)

1

MrStealYoBeef t1_jdqfzh7 wrote

Well let's see the DD. Who got trips and what did they say would happen?

1

doge_c137 t1_jdqgjp3 wrote

in terms of money, we have no money.

1

QualityOverQuant t1_jdql30f wrote

Ok board of Directors and upset management are NEVER EVER seen together unless it’s a staff party or gigantic get together where everyone backslaps each other and hands out bonuses.

So this could either be board telling management they have three months left on contracts ( very very unlikely) or starting Monday get ur ass online and deny every fukin rumour that we are going under

Because I swear if they were going under u can bet upper management would only find out of their partners told them they heard it on CNN . No one would have a clue

1

CraicShotGaming t1_jdqzreh wrote

"Prep anis" is my new favourite trading advice

1

Beevers06 t1_jdr5fh7 wrote

Let it burn, let it all burn

1

Anonsldrwhistleblow t1_jdrlmwe wrote

I really don’t like to be 🌈 🐻 on anything, but fuk these banks are making it difficult. I wouldn’t be surprised if this (DB, credit Suisse) or something similar is the case with most banks. Prep Anis indeed.

1

InfamousMB t1_jdrwftl wrote

Mmm these puts gon’ print 🤤🤤🤤

1

angel_of_tnt t1_jds1dx0 wrote

Note that "Milliarden" means "Billion" and "Billionen" are "Trillions" in english

1

Badwolfblue32 t1_jdt04mm wrote

Cant wait for margin call 2 to come out….great movie

1