Stop being a pussy. You wanna be able to ask your psychologist to come join you and picrel, your half-Japanese girlfriend, as she drags her haemorrhoid ass across my slate bathroom floor? Then take out your tampon and stick with your trades.

You gotta man up. Once after cutting my arm open during football game my senior season, I didn’t go see a psychologist. I yelled “Rev on the motor!” to the bus driver as we were lining up to board, so I could seal the wound on the exhaust pipe.

Cauterize those pussy puts and double down.