Who cares

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Thanks

I'm from a blue collar neighborhood that's left leaning. Just thought u should know they exist. But also who gives a shit about work lol just live

I usually just say my job title and explain what the part of the government I work for does and that’s enough and then we can move on to talking about how they would love to see the museums someday

Spy/secret agent

Not knowing exactly what you do, I always try to make it as relatable as possible. No one in the normal world is actually going to quiz you that hard if you say "I work on helping big companies provide good jobs." Everyone likes that, it's not in opposition to anything, and not what Fox News or Newsmax talk about. Could be harder for your field, but usually there's a super simple positive pitch.

When it comes to what you do, that can be harder if you have an "email job." But I find bitching about the boss is basically universal. So, "yeah I have to deal with a lot of stupid meetings, but it's worth it because sometimes I can help make (x) happen."

I like this answer lol

Sorry if I wasn’t clear. I totally agree there are left leaning blue collar communities.

And that’s my whole thing. It’s possible to enjoy aspects of the south or non city life but not be the stereotype of those (generally) more conservative leaning areas.

I guess generally “DC type jobs” aren’t as common in more rural areas so just wanted to hear experiences of people who work in DC but don’t belong to families that have a history of that type of work. (Aka non nepotism or having a family history of this kinda work)

And I’m not just saying blue collar communities. I just mean like “regular America.” I hate saying it like that and it’s not a good phrase since it’s not really accurate but I can’t think of another way to explain it

Overcome the objections before they happen. Meaning write out how you’d explain it to them if you didn’t care how they reacted.

you know what they’ll say. so, play out the conversation in your head with their objections.

Example: “I work for the Universal Negro Improvement Association we are dedicated to racial pride, economic self-sufficiency, and the formation of an independent Black nation in Africa.”

Them: “lol racial pride. That would be racist if I did that as a white man.”

Them: “self sufficiency?! Yea ok. Why they always looking for handouts then? Lol”

Them: “independent black nation in afrika wtf? So you buy them plane tickets, I’ll donate? Why they wanna go there so bad anyways, place is a dump.”

—-

Then you start over coming the objectives one by one in a way they’ll understand.

Then you add your answers and explanations into your description.

New Example: “I work for the Universal Negro Improvement Association. Our mission statement is ‘we are dedicated to racial pride, economic self-sufficiency, and the formation of an independent Black nation in Africa.’ But obviously that needs an explanation. Racial pride isn’t so much a black vs white thing, it’s an American thing, we’re a great country because we have a great history to be proud of, but black peoples history in America isn’t as thrilling, there were some dark times, and that’s tough to come to gripes with if you’re growing up black in America. It can feel like being an unwanted stranger in your own house, this causes something called black self hate, it’s kind of like depression, like aunt Mary Grace has, and you know how she makes bad decisions when she gets like that. So we feel learning the accomplishments of black history both in America and Africa is important, so that black people have something to be confident in and be proud of.

The second part about self reliance, and yes jimothy I know they love their handouts, and that’s part of the problem. It’s like how feeding an animal makes it not have the will or need to hunt, if you feed an animal it’s whole life then it won’t teach it’s kids how to hunt and provide for itself, now that animal is reliant on you for survival right? Right. That’s why it’s important for the black community to be able to support itself, important to be able to rely on themself, then they teach their kids that and it’s a cycle if improvement for black people and the nation as a whole. This feeds back into the racial pride part, now they have something to be proud of. We believe this is possible and we believe it is beneficial, but many black people cant see this as a possibility, that’s why we preach that their ability to provide for another race for hundreds of years is proof itself that it’s possible to provide for their own race.

Regarding going back to Africa, no, you can keep your delta miles if that’s what you were thinking! it’s not about plane tickets back home. An independent nation in Africa would be more of a fall back, a place of unity. Maybe some would go relocate, maybe some would visit, but all would be proud to have somewhere to call ‘their own’ in a time of hardship or crisis if that should ever occur. It’s about having options, having culture, and having brotherhood. Ideally all of us will achieve that here in America both black and white, but that’s proven to be harder than everyone expected, so it’s good to have a back up plan.

Anyways, that’s what I do.”

Do you see how the second example is much better for your crowd than what you’d say?

>I’m seeking to help bridge divides in an increasingly polarized America and meet people where they are.

This seems like just...way too much. My idea of meeting people where they are is to talk to them like adults, not tiptoe around their feelings about something that's none of their business, like how you earn a paycheck.

If you've managed to land a job that's meaningful for you (most people are not that lucky), that you enjoy and that pays well, you've already accomplished more than most people. There's really no need to take on the additional burden of trying to heal the American political divide in a mundane conversation about your job.

Do your more conservative friends and relatives feel compelled to explain their vocational choices to you or concern themselves with whether you'll find what they do for a living distasteful or objectionable?

just talk broadly about the efforts of your non profit.. don't talk about the culture or politics behind it. Describe your day to day if they ask for details.

if your employer is innately political, just lie and say you have a marketing job.

Yeah I don’t want to get into a whole convo about work unless they are curious and press for more.

But I guess at the Thanksgiving table it’s prob easier for your sibling who works at a bank, insurance agent, HVAC, nurse, construction worker, etc to explain their job Vs you working in DC as a think tank analyst, gov consultant, advocacy/nonprofit work job

No they don’t. And I admit a lot of this is just me overthinking stuff. But I guess it’s just different working a job that is sorta city specific and trying to take that back to more of a small town feel.

Kinda like if you’re in your hometown at the bar with your buddies

I guess explaining how you work for some progressive nonprofit taking zoom calls all day and dealing with policy stuff is different and perhaps more complicated then saying “I work at a bank, insurance Company, a kitchen, construction, etc) where people know what those jobs are

Thanks taking the time to share your advice. I appreciate it!

But agreed. Having a good sense ahead of time is better than trying to stumble through things in the fly

Yes exactly. You get the point I was making. You’re going to need to lead the entire thing to accomplish what you stated you want to accomplish.

Lol email job.

But I mean like if you work for the XYZ think tank or a liberal leaning policy coalition or something, kinda a different ballgame than most people

Either own being smart and enjoying your job and the flexibility it gives you to be able to command a city salary, and afford to have a place where you can enjoy rhe outdoors and lower cost of living like in wva.

I grew up in a very rural conservative area. You’ve just got to own being a different kind of smart, and not give a fuck. Or, try and be Superman and Clark Kent based on where you are. Just be your true self and whatever. Don’t sweat trying to fit your location. Just be real, not an asshole and you’ll be fine.

I've found they think it's cool but they really don't care

Honestly even if I worked for a conservative nonprofit, it’d still be tricky to share.

So I suppose I’m moreso talking about the DC job itself Vs the political connections or leaning.

Appreciate it! Haha part of this is when you’re at the house shooting the shit with the plumber or contractor or whatever and the convo turns to work stuff

And sometimes makes for weird convos with family at the holidays.

I guess where we are from is different than the DC worker who goes home to Boston, NY, San Fran, etc where their family is already in academia, gov, etc

The thing is why do you think a plumber wouldn’t genuinely be interested in what you do? Is it that you think they won’t understand your job? I’m always interested in what they’re doing. Goes both ways. Be an active and interested party and just genuinely talk to people. Gets you far. Everyone is happy that way

I grew up on a working farm in the west soooo it’s not like I came from a white collar family of doctors and lawyers. People from my small town of 700 people aren’t dumb they completely understand when I tell them what I do. Just because it’s not a job you can get there they get it. I’m not sure the distinction between the types of jobs, vs the geography I guess.

Agreed and definitely wasn’t insinuating anything negative about their intelligence or ability to understand things. Or curiosity

But going to a bar at happy hour and heading the conversations in DuPont Circle or Arlington is gonna be a lot different then your local pub in WV. Or the typical DC date questions may be different

I just mean circles, networks, and just bitching about your boss/job or whatever is different in DC Vs other places

I’ve found outside of DC and networking opportunities most people don’t really care or even bring up work that often. Coming from a rural area, when I go back, people are more concerned about the local sports team than asking me about my job. I think we tend to forget in this area that there are a lot of people who work to live and not live to work.

Not just solely geo specific. But kinda reminds me of when I got my liberal arts type degree. That was harder to explain Vs the kid who majored in business, engineering, nursing, etc.

Or the kid who went to trade school and then did an apprenticeship

Idk if that example helps

It’s different in some ways most people outside the beltway aren’t first going to size you up on who you work for etc. but outside they know you have a job whatever it’s off you’re personality etc. don’t sweat that just be genuine. The rest falls into place it took me a long time as a baby dc intern and up to figure this out. I don’t even remotely work in that same industry now and when I run into former people I worked with and they then give me the look of ohhhh you’re not a xxx, xxx, (insert any dc job, lobbyist, fundraiser, staffer etc) and I tell them what I do now. Which is not in that industry. It’s fun to watch their head spin.

Can I ask what made you shift? And what conclusion you came to?

I had a full ride liberal art scholarship, I dropped out after first year because I couldn’t take normal classes only music. Yet here I am with no degree living my best life. You got this.

And that was partially why I left DC (sorta since I’m semi close still)

I didn’t like the hustle culture but still enjoy the oppurtinity there

Thank you 💯

Shift from lobbyist to what I do now? I had an interim job but the person I worked for was a criminal. I made it my mission and got her convicted of 6 federal felonies for stealing money from a military charity. Then COVID hit and she’s still getting government $$$ and had clearances. She’s appealing because she didn’t do it but COVID set that all back. Whatever she’s out of that charity which folded but fuck her. She deserved what she sort of got. She’s still getting government money but she’s at least not stealing more $$$

After that I pivoted into something I loved and ran with it. So far so good

Don’t be so hung up on the job or title, just enjoy the ride.

Boss makes a dollar and I make a dime works for a long time.

But, I also had the experience doing organizing in tough areas for progressives. First realize that in the vast majority of places at least a third of people did vote for Biden. Then bring it back to the work you're doing and why it matters to you and them. Hit the personal story of why your topic matters.

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Not quite the same thing, but I have a lot of ultra lefty "fuck the fed" friends and I basically just jokingly call myself a government desk minion when the topic comes up to avoid getting into an awkward space, especially since it's a law enforcement org though thankfully not a remotely controversial one. If the mere mention of your organization is just inherently going to annoy people, keep it simple and to the topic of what you do- ie I'm a program a manager at a small non profit in DC and my day looks like this, this and this.

Kinda helps if your organization has a long, unfamiliar acronym because then people's eyes start to glaze over pretty quickly when you start explaining and it's real easy to change the conversation to something more interesting haha.

If it makes you feel any better, some people you talk to here probably also don't understand. I live and work here but all my jobs here have been contractor positions doing technical work that involves sitting and staring at a two monitors 8 or 10 hours a day, clicking and typing, typing and clicking, rarely getting to talk to anyone at all. The people I know who have these policy/advocacy/issues-oriented jobs explain to me what they do and I nod and say "Oh, OK" but rarely understand wtf they're talking about beyond the absolute basics.

When everyone was suddenly WFH in 2020, I had a neighbor whose balcony was right next to my bedroom window and I could see her out there the whole spring, doing Zoom meetings on her lap top two or three times a day. I was fascinated but also totally mystified that someone's job could entail spending so much of the day talking to people. Some jobs are just hard to understand if they're very different from yours.

I tell them what I do and then ask them who they’ve got winning in the most regionally relevant sports game going on that weekend. Vast majority of non DC normal people don’t really care/talk about politics unless directly promoted.

Good job for catching her and pursuing it. Don't understand why she's not in jail . It's almost like she was promoted

In MA?

No one outside my industry can understand what my employer does, and those in don’t understand my role as a lawyer for it. At least, when I worked at the State Department, everybody just thought I was a spy.

I've never had to go into much detail about my job here or anywhere else unless I am talking to someone in s similar field. Thanks to this thread I'll be prepared when that happens.

A lot of people here make the grave mistake of starting to believe their work is fascinating to everyone around them. That's as big a mistake here in DC as it is in WV or anywhere else. Also, human beings are very good at detecting any hint of self-aggrandizement or humble bragging, and react badly to such. Ultimately, nobody cares that you spent six months in Ulan Bator helping local collectives become more efficient at managing ruminant droppings. Come up with a one-sentence non-jargony explanation for your job, and be prepared to move on unless people show genuine interest.

You just tell them and don't treat them like they're too dumb to understand your big city job.

Glad you found something you’re enjoying and wow! Wasn’t expecting all that 😳

Caveat: My conservative family is in the UK, not America. I’ve found they don’t really care. Jobs are boring, particularly if you don’t have anything tangible to show for it. It’s not the politics, it’s just that it’s all too abstract. It can be a little heartbreaking when it’s something you want to share - a big win, a promotion, etc - but the way I’ve managed to keep my friendships and family is to genuinely meet people where they’re at, and where they’re at is that it’s not a thing. Your people might want you to justify yourself more, of course, but I imagine being down to earth and chill will go a longer way than trying to explain and persuade.

Ohio

I tell my Republican family members I am a go go dancer at number nine and other gay events, then tell them all about the house I own in the city because the job makes great money.

I’m also a DC <~> WV person and have a similar situation. I usually just say “I’m a lawyer and I work with nonprofits” rather than get into detail. I agree that at a certain point folks aren’t all that interested in much more than the 30000 foot view and you can usually do that without flying any particular flag.

I work for Congress And for some reason people think I actually for Congress, like it’s one entity and I work for all of it

Great !!

“I work for the feds” and if they ask doing what I say “I’m sorry I can’t tell you” and then whisper “but you really should erase those pictures from your phone”

Explain what sort of issues you advocate for without bringing up the explicit political lean

This is automatically assumed when I tell family/friends what I do.

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This is super tricky to navigate. I think a lot of it depends on the depth of the conversation and the familiarity of the listener with your line of work. I always try to find something innocuous to describe the work, something very neutral. Working on healthcare policy = making health insurance less expensive. Reducing energy carbon intensity = helping people make their own energy instead of needing to buy it. Something real short, relatively simple, always positive, and always politically neutral. Most of the time people just “cool” and want to move the conversation on.

Thanks!

My job is very technical - data, IT, cloud... I've had a longstanding joke with my conservative parents that I spend taxpayer dollars making vaporware for the cloud.

Is WV really that close? I thought it was 1-2 hrs min?

Yeah it’s not an everyday commute for me but Martinsburg has a MARC station and is about an hour twenty drive if you time the traffic right. I’m about 20 minutes further out.