Lived in both NYC and DC, and straight up I would say for you … NYC. 80k is not going to get you very far, so be prepared to either have a roommate (or two), or live further out. But even living further out in Brooklyn or Queens, it would still give you a lot of “fun stuff” and gay community. NYC might not be a place you would stay forever, and you might even move down to DC in a few years, but you really should give it a try.