www.theonion.com/retired-security-guard-pens-open-letter-to-colin-kaeper-1819579229 https://www.theonion.com/i-just-wish-nfl-players-could-find-a-way-to-protest-wit-1819585036 you people have brain worms

evergreen link: https://www.theonion.com/de-blasio-well-well-well-not-so-easy-to-find-a-may-1847151201

been a while since someone wrote a hit song about twistin’](https://www.theonion.com/it-s-been-a-while-since-someone-wrote-a-hit-song-about-1819584933/amp)

here you go my man. https://www.theonion.com/slow-witted-conspiracy-theorist-convinced-government-be-1819575953

Every time Eric Adams does anything, [the onion's article](https://www.theonion.com/de-blasio-well-well-well-not-so-easy-to-find-a-may-1847151201/amp) gets more factual

good advice what to do in this situation. Hire Lil Wayne to assist the interdiction efforts: https://www.theonion.com/dea-recruits-lil-wayne-to-use-up-all-drugs-in-mexico-1819594868

this you? lol](https://www.theonion.com/why-do-all-these-homosexuals-keep-sucking-my-cock-1819583529)

point Onion article.](https://www.theonion.com/conscientious-suv-shopper-just-wants-something-that-wil-1844930331)

much darker anthem before being watered down. https://www.theonion.com/restoration-of-star-spangled-banner-uncovers-horrifying-1819594927

This whole thread and the complaints about these apartments remind me of this old Onion article: https://www.theonion.com/report-nations-gentrified-neighborhoods-threatened-by-1819569723

www.theonion.com/unreleased-jimmy-page-guitar-riff-to-be-retrieved-from-1819569019 Read

www.theonion.com/pretty-cute-watching-boston-residents-play-daily-game-o-1819574643

there's no point if any fraud happens" is clearly stupid. Also kind of like this https://www.theonion.com/no-way-to-prevent-this-says-only-nation-where-this-r-1819576527

www.theonion.com/de-blasio-well-well-well-not-so-easy-to-find-a-may-1847151201

Sounds familiar ](https://www.theonion.com/obama-sarcastically-asks-how-israel-afforded-such-a-gre-1819574703)

just leave this here https://www.theonion.com/de-blasio-well-well-well-not-so-easy-to-find-a-may-1847151201

wanted this to just be satire.](https://www.theonion.com/de-blasio-well-well-well-not-so-easy-to-find-a-may-1847151201)

going to commute to Groton. https://www.theonion.com/i-95-diagnosed-with-highway-cancer-1819574370

www.theonion.com/rocky-horror-picture-shows-cult-following-just-doesnt-h-1819571793

www.theonion.com/fuck-everything-were-doing-five-blades-1819584036

fair, I did [shamelessly steal it from The Onion](https://www.theonion.com/jurisprudence-fetishist-gets-off-on-technicality-1819586446)

Always Gets Little Rush out of Telling People John Lennon Beat Wife](https://www.theonion.com/man-always-gets-little-rush-out-of-telling-people-john-1819578998)

Testament!](https://www.theonion.com/god-diagnosed-with-bipolar-disorder-1819566045)

www.theonion.com/existentialist-firefighter-delays-3-deaths-1819571551

Irish-Americans Gear Up For 'The Reinforcin' O' The Stereotypes'](https://www.theonion.com/irish-americans-gear-up-for-the-reinforcin-o-the-stereo-1819586600)

Onion](https://www.theonion.com/anyone-see-ted-lasso-biden-asks-world-leaders-try-1846742418) has become the modern day Nostradamus

onion: CEO relieved AI can never replace him if he already contributes nothing to the company https://www.theonion.com/ceo-relieved-ai-can-never-replace-him-if-he-already-con-1850129310

Onion and the word "horrifying"? I feel like they use that word [all the time](https://www.theonion.com/search?blogId=1636079510&q=horrifying&timestamp=1680121783235)...

Well, well, well ](https://www.theonion.com/de-blasio-well-well-well-not-so-easy-to-find-a-may-1847151201?utm_campaign=TheOnion&utm_content=1624391783&utm_medium=SocialMarketing&utm_source=twitter)

Just Used to Wash Dish to be Prize for Hand-to-Hand Combat in 2065](https://www.theonion.com/amount-of-water-man-just-used-to-wash-dish-to-be-prize-1819578198)