AndyZep t1_j6piif9 wrote

Blue. It was my mother's favorite color too and she wore something blue every single day since she became a mother. There were all kinds of blue art objects. It had something to do with a belief that this helped with safe pregnancies. She may have overshot the mark she had five boys


AndyZep t1_j5rg5xh wrote

Fair point. In this case I was using Asshole synonymous with a F-up or a screw up. I did think that the question, as asked, was pretty self evident. To me it read like: "I'm a former substance abuser who just recently abused another substance, was that a bad idea?" it seems very self evident to me that anyone with any sense would agree that, "Yes that was a very bad idea." Maybe I'm wrong, mabye that is not the way that would Universally be looked at, but I can't comprehend that anyone with any sense would not see that as a bad thing. I felt like the actual question you were asking was an unstated question more like: "I know that was a bad idea, but am I completely screwed." If that was not, in fact, the question that you were asking us, and yourself, then maybe it should be.

So I looked at it from the point of view that it is not healthy to get too caught up in self flagellation over a mistake because some people actually get caught up in the emotional roller coaster of Screw up, guilt, despair, hopelessness.... and then back to the beginning with screw up. There are actually some people who crave the excitement of that kind of Up/Down emotional roller coaster. Especially people who come from dysfunctional backgrounds. So Self flagellation is not the best reaction to slipping. So thinking that you are completely screwed is not the correct course of action. You also don't want to become a "Golden slipper" who feels like you have it all figured out and just need a few minor tweaks. What you should be doing is looking it as you are someone who is in a car heading straight to crapsville, at a very high rate of speed. You really should turn the wheel, because the further you go down this road the more difficult it becomes to turn the wheel until you finally drive yourself so far down that it is almost impossible to turn the wheel.

So I made several assumptions about what you were actually asking, which may actually be untrue. I also incorrectly changed the question from "Did I F up" to am I a "F up". I guess, if that is the case, my question would be. On what planet would people think that you did not F-up? Because to me it seems obvious that you are in a car headed to crapsville and it would be a good idea to turn the wheel.

Sorry if I answered a question that you were not asking.


AndyZep t1_j5r8mgi wrote

The only answer to the actual question you asked that can be taken seriously is Yes, you did FU by abusing your ADHD medication. I think that there is an unstated question that is less definite and that question is "Am I totally screwed" The answer to that question is a solid "Maybe"

It certainly is not "Good" that a former substance abuser who is in recovery has just abused another substance. That said, it is predictable that a former substance abuser who is taking Ritalin may "Slip". It happening even once is very concerning. You do, however, sound very sincere in your desire to nip this in the bud and even though 99% of addicts can talk a good game at this point it has only happened once. Just don't be an idiot and become a "Golden slipper" which is someone who talks a great game but slips pretty much all the time.

Right now it's about 60/40 on where you end up on the AH/Not an AH spectrum with it leaning towards AH. Every week that goes by where you do not screw up again moves you further and further away from AH. But, keep in mind that moving towards AH moves at the speed of a rocket ship and moving away from AH moves at the speed of a snail. So let's not get upset if it takes a long long time before you have any idea what the answer to that question is because the only answer that comes quickly is "Yes you most certainly are an AH" So be happy that you do not have an answer yet.-


AndyZep t1_j5quw2t wrote

They know it but they seem to be forgetting that they know it. I think that they are waaaay out on a limb claiming to know the shape of what they cannot see. They know what is happening around it to a degree but they are assuming that what they "See" is an accurate representation of what "Is". My opinion is that their extrapolations that some black holes are in the shape of a birthday hat are likely a bridge too far. I may not be an "expert" but I call Shenanigans.


AndyZep t1_j5qffwt wrote

When you look in the direction of a really hot grill on a sunny day and look at something beyond it. The visual appearance of the things beyond it are hazy because the rising heat distorts the visible appearance of things beyond it.

I'm just going to out and out hypothesize, without a whit of training in Physics or anything related to space, that what is going on is that since we don't actually see black holes. we only see things around them, that our perspective on them is probably distorted. I cannot fathom how it would not be round.