You entertained his fantasy every step of the way so far, or at least pretended to be on the fence about it, which is probably why he has gone so far with it.

The moment you hear about a fetish/fantasy that you're totally against you just say it, and that concludes everything. You went along with his fantasy so he took more steps to make it a reality. Not sure what else you expected.

If you weren't interested in his fantasy, you should have just said so. Playing games to "see how far he goes with it" if you didn't want to participate is silly and manipulative. There's nothing wrong with fantasies/fetishes and talking about it with your spouse is what you should be doing, instead of hiding it. It's just another one of these threads that the conclusion of which is "you shouldn't talk about your sexual fantasies with your spouse" and that sucks. Don't be that way.

Maybe she was searching you for a gun?

Dunno if this is a Murican thing, but just because someone doesn't feel like working 24/7 doesn't mean they are lazy. Work isn't and shouldn't be everything. Mental well being and feeling good with yourself matters more.

As for her falling out of shape, that will sometimes happen. If you conclude that you no longer find her attractive in any way better just leave now. There's no information as to how long you two have been together so it's not clear whether this is a long established relationship that should be fought for, or something that should be quickly cut off due to incompatibility.