Not allowing your unemployed thirty year old who refuses to keep a job live in your house and eat your food while he plays video games 8+ hours a day is NOT "hating your kids".

For fuck's sake man, no.

The worst thing OP's parents can be blamed for is allowing him to live in thier home doing nothing since he was a teenager. It's unacceptable and allowing it isn't love- ITS ENABLING.

My mum did the same shit for my brother until he was 49.... When he dropped dead from untreated high blood pressure because even though she held his hands, paid all his bills and wiped his ass on a daily basis- she couldn't actually "take care of him" because he was a god damn adult who needed to get his shit together.... And now he's dead.

Yeah, my husband still lived with his folks at 28 when we got together- because between his 70k a year career, and his hobbies doing tech for local theatres- he was almost never home and it didn't seem smart to waste his money on an apartment. But he also helped his parents pay the bills from age 18- he wasn't living there rent-free doing jack shit. And he is unbelievably skilled - he's not only a freaking programmer, an electrical engineer, and is extremely talented in all trades - he could easily be an electrician, a mechanic - so yeah, living at home didn't make him a loser.... But re-read OP's post.

Are you really trying to say that this guy doesn't have MAJOR unaddressed issues?

Keep it up man. You deserve this life you've made for yourself. Good for you for getting your shit together. Remember, recovery is a journey that lasts the rest of your life if you let it. Just keep going, you're doing great.

Have you ever looked into getting therapy? And treatment for ADHD / depression - it certainly sounds like you have all the classic telltale signs as well as serious executive dysfunction.

And I can tell you- your parents DID fail you....

By allowing you to move back in.

If my child thinks I will EVER allow him to live in my house, playing video games for 8+ hours a day while he can't maintain a job.... Holy shit.

I can't believe that they allowed you to move back in, didn't ask you to contribute you the household bills, and have done absolutely nothing after you've done absolutely nothing consistent to better yourself or your situation in all that time.

My man- ADHD is hard. Adulting is hard. But you've literally admitted that you've wasted almost all of your 31 years - and it hasn't occurred to you that you DEEPLY need medical care to get to the route of your serious mental health issues ...

Please. Get up tomorrow and start making phone calls. GET TREATMENT.

You are never going to get better or have any kind of life worth living if you don't.

My brother died last year at 49 from untreated high blood pressure and he literally lived your exact life that whole time. You don't want to end up like he did.