Plot twist Number 1: the hitchhikers are actually really cool, but are just normal people who got stuck in this alternative universe because they got out of their car. Once you let them into your car, they will gradually transform back into humans, and suddenly you're having a sexy-fun roadtrip.

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Post twist Number 2: the narrator/OP is frightened of going to hell because, during their life, they committed a hit-and-run, or deliberately ran over a homeless person for funsies. Those of us who are in the comments section telling OP to be decent and give the hitchhikers are actually demons trying to do them the wrong thing, and the hitchhikers are going to tear OP apart when they get a hold of them.

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Plot twist number 3: The OP is in purgatory and all the hitchhikers are the same homeless person that the OP ran over, who is just wanted to be treated with basic humanity in life, and can't cross over to the afterlife and make peace until somebody treats him basic kindness. When the OP lets him into the car, and they both make peace, then they can move on to eternal peace/ a new reincarnation.

Twist number 4: You, the person reading this, wasted your life farting around on social media sites and are now dead and trapped in a purgatory where you must spend thousands of years reading this neverending list of plot twists.

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Twist number 5: I am dead after wasting my life farting around in comment sections, and are now condemned to spend my eternity thinking up plot twists.

Probably not those last two, though, because I'm already bored of this schtick.

OP already killed Krampus and publicly announced it.

Nothing on the internet is completely anonymous and the North Pole probably already has their IP address. I'm just encouraging them to carpe all their diems before the reindeer murder squad mercs their ass.

The cold will bother you slightly less (a 2 degree celcius difference, to be precise).

However, if you are on the hunt for love, your dating pool will consist only of people who are freaks, in the psychological sense.

You can decide for yourself whether this is a good or bad thing.

If you eat it, you get a +5 bonus to your ability to stuff small children into sacks and trap people in snowglobes, but the downside is that you will grow hair over your entire body, including the soles of your feet and your tongue. Make your choice.

Three words: festive holiday meat.

Borrow your neighbour's meat grinder.Since the meat is already rank, don't eat it yourself but feed it to your enemies and relatives, and hope it doesn't give them Christmas themed superpowers.