JOWWLLL

JOWWLLL t1_j8zrg2r wrote

Meanwhile, at the Pentagon:

Colonel: PRIVATE! Our Commander-in-Chief needs answers about that commie chy-na balloon. Where's that spreadsheet?

Private: Yes sir. Right here, sir.

Very good. Tell me, how much did logistics, jet fuel, salaries, and that one fancy missile cost the American people?

*tap tap tap tap* $1,200.000.00, sir.

And how much did those toilet seats we ordered last week cost us, apiece?

*tap tap* ... *tap tap tap tap* $18,000.00.

YOU WILL ADDRESS ME AS SIR!

Sir Yes Sir! Sorry, Sir! $18,000.00 Sir!

That's better. Now. How much to manufacture those seats?

*tap tap tap* 18 cents, sir.

Given these figures, what is your conclusion? Speak freely.

Well sir, for decades the military has paid our suppliers orders of magnitude more for toilet seats than they should have, and nobody cares. I see no need to worry about cost overruns here.

Private, you are a goddamn genius! I thank you, and our President thanks you. You have a bright future as a loyal and obedient member of the United States Military.

Sir, thank you, Sir. I have one more question, if I may?

Go ahead, private.

There's the small matter of reimbursing that hobbyist $20.00 for his bal-

DISMISSED!!!!!

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JOWWLLL t1_iy9n9ui wrote

You are correct. But I was talking about reducing heat, not attempting to warm oneself up. Cold beer on a hot day is one of life's little pleasures. Caveat: It's also important to drink non-alcoholic fluids, as any alco-bev* acts as a diuretic.

*see Coneheads.

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