They only ever have 1 current model, the current version is the TM6. I've had the predecessor, the TM5, since 2016 and I'm using it several times a day.

My mother had a light bulb burst in her hand when she changed a ceiling light like 25 years ago. A shard got into her left eye and as a result she is nearly blind on that eye. I was quite traumatized by the whole situation and as a result always wear safety googles when changing light bulbs overhead.

Would a Thermomix fit your bill? The older models are known to run for decades. The blades are very easily detachable if something gets stuck undernaeth them (which isn't that frequent from my smoothie making experience). It takes up to 2.2 litres.

I am feeling very stupid for operating our Peugeot salt and pepper grinders (also a wedding gift 4 years ago) exactly the same way your parents are doing, minus the slamming on the table, thankfully. Does the reverse motion damage the burrs or is it just not effective? It just find the back-and-forth rotation more comfortable than a constant one-directional rotation with regripping the grinder.

To comment on the "buy it for life part" of the grinders: One of the screws on the underside holding the little clamp came loose recently and we found it again in the rissoto we were preparing. Was an easy fix, though.