That's probably a good approach yes. (Though obviously it would still help if I just go do things I enjoy in the first place so any outcome is secondary. But there's a bit of a conflict of interest there cause I don't really enjoy social interaction and all of my hobby's are quite solitary too)

As fun as some of those sound having been incapacitated for work for over a decade now I've pretty much given up on any 'big' dreams (or anything that involves money). Love would be nice but I feel I should first be able to be 100% happy on my own first because right now a love interest would probably become my hyperfocus which never is a good idea.
Though I guess there might be something here about how I do have things I want but for each dream there's immediately thoughts about how it's not realistic or the wrong thing to want..

That sounds like a good way to approach it! Of course that does still require to at least know you want to learn Japanese..

Well it was just an example but I guess in a way it's one of my goals, since all friends I had/have settled down and changed from 'apping daily' to 'seeing eachother once every 2 months'. I can be quite the loner and perfectly fine spending weeks without seeing anyone but I guess everyone likes having some people you feel comfortable around.But I'd think the best approach to that is 'doing things that appeal to you so you'll meet people with common interests' and then there I get kinda stuck again. (Like for example I'm very invested in pop music but I don't like big crowds so I don't enjoy concerts so that leaves... hanging around in record stores?? Well and online communities I guess but I have no lack of online people to discuss things with)

And going to things/activities in hopes of meeting people/making friends kinda reminds me of how as a teen/twentier I used to spend every night out hoping to find love, like it feels there's an element of desperation/wanting it too much to it when you're chasing it instead of letting things just happen organically? But then it's not like a lot happens organically when I spend all my time at home so I do feel I should find something I find worth spending time on out of the house..

I'm already doing the occasional meditation which does help me relax a bit but thusfar it never gave me any.. insights? (will look into yogic breathing and pranayama though!)