He abused you. You need to leave and he needs to kick his mother out.

Him taking your work laptop is childish and you two need therapy if you going to save the marriage. Minimum you tell him you going to a hotel and will be speaking to a lawyer. If he wants to keep this marriage you will listen but he needs to make major changes now.

Are you an owner of the house?

So what sort of action items or lists have you developed to ease each other's fears and keep communication open? Therapy is great and if resources would be available everyone should have someone permanently available, but it is only 1 step forward.

If you and your partner can't get over the required openness that will be needed for a LONG TIME then it will be very tough.

Why do you both want to work this out is my first question? You now both have trust issues. So why is this worth it to both of you? If you both really loved each other you wouldn't have felt need to go outside of the relationship for validation or you wouldn't have felt a need to get revenge on him.

It isn't just you being very honest with him it is him being honest with you. Generally I would view what you have as a toxic relationship and it is only 1 year long.

Please this is B.S. People are still dating all the time. Just because you feel bad you can't hoot at a woman who walks by you doesn't mean men can't approach women.

She is allowed to feel how she is in the situation that occurred. You might not like it that women are able to express their dislikes of these situation but you shouldn't try to control how they feel.

So your fiancé obviously had good intentions but if you don't like a style that is ok. That is why buying clothes for others is tough. Until people try it on anyways you don't know if you will like it regardless.

I would just talk to him and tell him you really do appreciate that he got you a gift but reiterate it just wasn't your style. Also in the future telling your honest opinion about something is better. In addition, giving short responses can be seen that you are upset at him.

Always try to say something good about the attempt before you explain why you don't like it. It was a gift and you are engaged so these communication issues are extremely important.

So part of me wishes someone would have ever done this to me lol but no I would say that it would be uncomfortable about random people just coming up and saying this stuff.

I don't get how not sleeping over at her place and such is a problem. If she gets a boyfriend then her situation is likely to be the same and she will probably just put boundaries up. This will likely really hurt him in the future.

I think the thing is that you make it clear you don't want him to lose her as a friend but you don't see why he has to stay overnight at her place and such.

He wants everything and doesn't want to lose anything. He is being pretty selfish.

Your in love with the person who you want him to be not the person he is. It is hard to get rid of an emotional attachment but you are not going to change him.

He is still more emotionally invested with his friend than you. Putting general boundaries doesn't ruin a friendship and she would understand. He still has an attachment with her and I would break up with him if he refuses to change (or even if he says he will).

It is one thing to have a really good friend but this is overboard.

Why would you even attempt to work out issues? A cheater who doesn't give you attention or validates your situation.

He can help out financially with a court order if need be.

So that is where the marital counseling comes into play. You don't have to demand she show them now but say this issue is driving a wedge in your marriage and you want her to go to therapy to help resolve these issues.

If she says you just need to do it yourself and alone then again you have your answer on her priorities. Partner's need to support each other even if one person thinks it isn't a big deal.

No you are not crazy. This could be emotional cheating and probably is. The fact is you know what is going on and your wife is refusing to accept that it is inappropriate and be open with it. If she would show you all her conversations it would be one thing but it isn't happening.

I would demand marital counseling and if she refuses and doesn't change her behavior consider a divorce.

Yes I knew my wife was the one after a few months. We were about your ages when we met and at that time we both kind of knew what we were looking for in a partner and our communication was awesome.

After a year I proposed and a year later we got married. We have been married for 7 years now and it has been amazing.

Trust your gut and try not to overthink things.

The only way to make amends is for your to show how much you care for him through actions not words.

You have only been dating a few months so I can't recommend anything else but if it goes on longer you might want to do therapy with him if you ever want to marry him.

Yes what you did was very cruel and he might not be able to get over it.

Time to break up. You won't be able to trust her anymore and she is just going to give you the trickle truth at this point. She shouldn't be "embarrassed" but should be ashamed for lying to you and did basically cheat on you by sending the nudes.

She needs therapy it sounds like and you aren't going to be the one who changes her.