You get the love you accept. If this is what you want… knock yourself out. At this point she has shown you she is a wreck and you keep choosing to be the crash test dummy that gives the boyfriend experience.

It will not stop. Merely go through periods you cannot see conclusively it is happening. If you dont respect yourself, not sure why you expect her to.

How do you expect others to respect you when you have none for yourself?

You hand a knife to a maniac and seem surprised they do not stop stabbing you.

Blow up her wretched life by ensuring everyone knows what her word, her vows, and her promises mean. Find a shark lawyer and get what you can from this sorry period of your life. Stop being a fool, you cannot convince the leopard to change their spots painting them as stripes instead. You will still get mauled.