OrgyInTheBurnWard t1_ir0t1ir wrote

Since he deleted his response before I had a chance to post mine, here it is:

His comment for context:

>First of all, let me make sure you understand what I’m saying. It’s not that you can’t tell a joke unless you’re 100% sure it would be funny for everybody, which I presume is what you mean by “impossible to accomplish”. That’s not what the “100%” refers to. What I am saying is that you don’t get to blame the listener for not having a sense of humor if the joke falls flat, and if the joke did cause offense, that you should be the one apologizing.

>Secondly, as for your exception:

>>unless it’s an audience of one

>why then doesn’t the concept apply to an audience of two, or three, or five? At how many listeners does it become not your fault someone is offended?

>Again, people screw up, and friends can generally forgive somebody who apologized sincerely, but I’m talking about where the fault lies, and therefore if anybody should apologize.

And my rebuttal:

>With one person, you only have to worry about the sensibilities of a single solitary person. Each additional listener increases the chance that someone in the audience won't enjoy the joke. That's difficult enough for professional comedians with an audience full of fans that already enjoy their brand of humor. Imagine being an amateur performing for complete strangers who have never heard of you. You can't possibly take every audience member's personal sensitivies into account, nor should you. Comedy is an art, and art is subjective.

I wasn't going to let all that go to waste.


OrgyInTheBurnWard t1_ir0bjme wrote

If anything, say something along the lines of, "I was trying to be funny and not hurtful, and failed at both. I'm sorry I hurt you." You can explain your motivations without making excuses. I think having a mutual understanding of a given situation is important for both apologies and forgiveness.


OrgyInTheBurnWard t1_ir0b3dp wrote

>So here’s the thing about jokes. It’s 100% the responsibility of the joke teller to ensure that it’s funny to every joke hearer.

Fuck that. That's the dumbest shit I ever heard, and completely impossible to accomplish--that is unless it's an audience of one, which is the case here.


OrgyInTheBurnWard t1_ir0aqb8 wrote

It depends on the context. If the friend had just said something to the effect of, "My garden is full of weeds. Remind me that I need to stop at Lowe's to buy a hoe," then the "Your moms a hoe," would fit. Without any relevant context, however, it's just weird and uncalled for.