PreferenceIcy3052

PreferenceIcy3052 t1_j6nmixw wrote

Well, that's the point. I haven't heard his side of things, but I'm telling you, he sounds like he's being very selfish.

Why should you have to do the brunt of the work? Either you find a way to make it 50/50, or the person who does the majority of the work ought to have the say in what's going to happen. In this case, that's you.

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PreferenceIcy3052 t1_j6nm1sj wrote

No, I wouldn't do it.

But in reality, I find it's hard to do this sort of thing once the ball is rolling in your career. You're better to do it before, or a good ways into your career after you've proven yourself, and have a stable framework to go back to, which in reality, would probably take many years.

If it were me, I'd do like a few weeks in another country before fully committing myself to my career for the long term.

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PreferenceIcy3052 t1_j6ne1hb wrote

By the way you're telling the story, it sounds like your fiance is in the wrong.

It sounds like he feels attacked, and rather than understand your request for help, he feels pressured to do the things he doesn't want to do, such as take a higher position in his company.

You said this was just last night. So, maybe he will come around? If not, he needs to learn to take your requests for help more seriously. Sometimes there's more than one solution to a problem, so you two need to talk it out and compromise and go from there.

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PreferenceIcy3052 t1_j6nd3wh wrote

Yes, you're being fair.

Having said that, remember that there will literally *never* be a good time to do something like this if you put your career first. However, let me make myself clear with this: I'm not saying you should do it sooner; I'm just saying that as someone who values their career and work life, I literally never think it's a *good* time to do these things, so I've missed out a lot.

Remember to keep a good balance in the long run.

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