ScreenAlone t1_jacziat wrote

second this x 10000. Have had to deal with bed bugs from a neighbor who refused to treat. The block ended up spending like 2 years treating and sending those bugs one way or another, getting them to go away, only to come back again. Finally moved out. Luckily I was renting the bed bug house but if i was trapped in a 30 year mortgage in that situation idk what I would have done I haven't found noise to be an issue I never hear my neighbors and they never hear us. I think the brick insulates pretty well but critters don't care about walls lol.


ScreenAlone t1_jacyh8m wrote

I don't fully buy the skatepark/dirtbike comparison. Skateparks take up a relatively small amount of space, skateboards aren't noisy. But mostly - someone riding their board to and from a skatepark wouldn't be noticeable at all. How do people think these people are going to get to and from these hypothetic motocross tracks lol


ScreenAlone t1_j9zz7qd wrote

Just saw a pack of rebels do a sweep through my neighbors house looking for any evidence of studying - dragged them out and killed in the street.

From what I have heard they mostly look for people with critical thinking skills though so seems like you might be ok


ScreenAlone t1_j7gcbvj wrote

sounds good! let me look for some shows and I'll get back to you. For book clubs and stuff, join some different neighborhood facebook groups and search the posts in there for "book club" and you'll see a bunch. Here's one in Canton. that reads books on the NY best seller list and meets for beers to discuss. And then the Baltimore Social Issue's Book club is pretty active as well and reads a lot of Baltimore focused books (i think).

Another option I forgot about....I don't know what your schedule is like but if you can swing a part time gig at a bar or restaurant, you'll make life long friends in about .5 seconds ha. I still have friends now from places I worked at 12 years ago. And never hurts to make a little extra money on the side.


ScreenAlone t1_j7fs2br wrote

I'm from around here so didn't have the issue in Baltimore but I struggled similarly in other cities when I moved a bit in my 20's. I'm in my early 30's now gahh lol so maybe it's changed but from having done Volo leagues and different group events throughout my twenties, was pretty much out at the bars every weekend all weekend etc..... my take is that most neighborhoods in Baltimore aren't very "transplanty" and people have known each other for a looooong time, so depending on the Volo team you get put on, or the different events you do, even if people are friendly it can be hard to tap into a friend group that is already so established. Not that people aren't looking for new friends per se, but with people now being of working age, dating, etc. you don't have as much time as you did in college and it's hard enough to see the people you already know let alone make an entire new friend from scratch. It's a lot easier to just keep hanging with the people you already know and maybe meet some new friends through friends of friends.

All of that to say is making friends is haaard sometimes, and also really sucks to not have a solid group of friends set up. I also had the problem of going from a place like Baltimore where I knew 100000 people to knowing 0 and it was hard not to get discourged/internalize it. Particularly when you are the person on the outside who doesn't know anyone, it can feel weird to always be reaching out to the same person or two you may meet on a volo league who already has an established friend group - but don't internalize it like I did lol, it's not your fault or anything to do with you if that makes sense. My times were before the friend/dating apps though so the DL people on bumble is a new one for me lol no advice on that one.

The things that ended up working for me though were finding groups for different hobbies that I'm really engaged in. Whereas the volo leagues are more just a way to be social - finding Facebook groups or spaces where people are more consistently involved it's easier to get involved. Like if you like volleyball, Baltimore Beach in fed hill/the harbor has pick up league hours every weekend spring-fall. You can just hop on and start playing, you'll start seeing the same people every weekend and then can inch in that way. I saw you said you like reading, there are lots of book clubs you can find where people meet each week for drinks/food to discuss books etc.

tl;dr: don't get discouraged, making friends is harder than people make it out to be especially in a city like Baltimore and can make you feel shitty. It's not you though. Social leagues can be hit or miss, but finding groups dedicated to a specific hobby you like is what worked for me.


P.S. just saw your comment about the music you like. Look up the upcoming shows for venues like 8x10; soundstage; rams head; ottobar; union craft brewing and i'll go with ya. First ticket is on me. (also i'm a guy but I promise i'm not secretely trying to have sex with you LOL)


ScreenAlone t1_j6f9j4m wrote

Don’t have any insight but damn can you imagine just chilling in a house knowing you are pulling something over on someone and being ok with it. Especially someone you met personally.

Do they have friends over? What do they tell them? Do they answer the door or your calls? They just go about their life as normal? Crazy. I’d have so much anxiety it wouldn’t even be worth the free rent.


ScreenAlone t1_j61m2u4 wrote

if you are looking for a non Police solution (not that you aren’t entitled to that or that I’m saying you shouldn’t by any means). There is a harm reduction org in the area (SPARC) that has good rapport with users in the area that might be able to engage the people of the house for you (and anonymously). But idk how much they are involved with dealers as opposed to “low level” users.

If you want to engage the police the district leadership are usually pretty responsive to that kind of stuff (atleast vocally idk what it looks like in the back end) but the district emails are on the BPD webpages or if you go to their monthly meetings (hybrid w/ a zoom meeting) you can talk to them directly and the district detective units usually give their direct contact info


ScreenAlone t1_iybuxza wrote

wasn’t there a video of a guy getting hit by the light rail on Howard street a few years and basically split in half or dragged or something wild? Not about to go looking for it but vaguely remember something like that


ScreenAlone t1_it5rfhq wrote

I’ve been in SE baltimore for about 8 years, mostly on the NE end of patterson park. have drunkenly walked, biked, and scootered home from just about everywhere in the city at all hours. One of my finer moments was a walk from soundstage in the harbor to Charles village at 1am on foot solo. Hypothetically speaking also may have napped in a bush or two along Boston street coming from fells in my post college years. Scariest thing to happen to me occurred just last week when I went to throw my dogs poop bag into a dumpster and a black cat jumped out of it and ran away. scared the crap out of me lol.

Not that things don’t happen here, but nobody posts on social media that they walked home safely at night, made it to and from work without getting carjacked, or walked the dog/went running with headphones in. There’s like 20,000 people in the neighborhoods surrounding the park, multiply that by daily commutes, walks, etc. the odds of an altercation are quite low (but never zero).

In all seriousness though, as others have said…. Just be aware of your surroundings, trust your gut, and don’t feel bad about crossing streets as people are coming the other the way, especially when walking late at night. if something seems really off or it’s super late I’ll walk in the middle of the street to reduce the chance someone is hiding around a corner or something.

The only other things I’d add would be that:

  1. you can’t put a price on a comfortable living situation. Especially when moving to a new city and particularly one like Baltimore that is very block by block. a bad spot can break you. choose a safe bet over a good deal and after a few months you’ll have a much better sense of the area, where and what you are comfortable with. A common piece of advice on here is to visit the area you are considering multiple days and times. We joke in this thread about people asking the safety question again and again but people will also help you if you have questions about a spot. Feel free to DM me as well.

  2. Don’t escalate things, even if you are in the right. When details come out about these incidents, so many of them are a minor, drunken altercation that escalated. Better to just end the encounter and leave the area. In any large city environment you never know who’s carrying what nowadays.

  3. I’ve fortunately never been the victim of a robbery, mugging, carjacking etc. but my rule of thumb is that I’d leave somewhere butt naked before I fought back over a material possession of mine. I don’t mean to sound victim blamey for 2&3, minor altercations shouldn’t escalate to life altering violence, and not fighting back doesn’t always work, but the reality is not fighting back won’t make things worse for you.