>How can I get her to act like an adult?

You don't. That has to be something she wants to do and she clearly isn't in the head space for that. If you're unhappy in the relationship, just leave. Don't drag it out. You tried the ultimatum and no contact thing and it didn't work so I can't see why you'd want to stick around anymore.

Tell him that he either shuts up or you start reconsidering the relationship. You can't stay with someone who blatantly criticizes you without giving a shit about your feelings.

Wait, you guys started dating and then moved in together after 2 months?

Yeah, I'd just move on. I know I probably forgot to delete some apps after being with my partner.

Hell, even after deleting them, I still get spam emails from those sites. It's annoying as fuck.

So........what advice did you want?

I wouldn't consider it a red flag just yet. My partner's uncle is the same way and I don't think he's being malicious.

Maybe she thinks you're really poor?

It's an old messaged from when they used to talk and they haven't spoken since. I wouldn't worry about it.

If you have proof, I'd send it to the other guy. You're right, he deserves to know.

It would absolutely bother me less if my partner met a friend and said "you know what, not for me" because at least that shows that they made an effort to get to know the people close to me. They don't have to like my friends, so long as they can behave civilly if the occasion calls for it.

If you have some trauma behind certain behaviors, work on that with a therapist. Trying to avoid it instead of learning to deal with it doesn't make things any better.

The example of the friend behaving in a creepy manner doesn't really apply here. You're assuming that this person is going to do something based on your interactions with completely different people. If you want your boundaries to be known before hand, ask your partner to tell their friend in advance so it doesn't come up.

Actively avoiding a specific friend based off assumptions is going to cause a rift all the same. It just sounds like you have some hang ups about people who post more of their body online.

People don't behave like a hive mind. You've had some shit experiences but clearly your BF enjoys spending time with them so it's worth seeing what that is.

I'd be pretty peeved if my partner refused to meet up with a friend of mine based on assumptions.

You're assuming you won't get along with her despite never meeting her? That's a big leap. If you don't like her content, don't follow it. Clearly your BF finds her fun to hang out with so it's at least worth meeting her and then deciding if you like her or not.

When you're getting to know people, there's always going to be moments where you have to set boundaries, especially physical ones.

If you're worried about your BF being friends with her CURRENTLY why don't you talk to him about it?

I don't see how this impacts you in any way. You don't need to follow their social media and so long as you set some firm boundaries about physical touch with her, you should be fine.

You don't have to be best friends but I wouldn't go out of your way to avoid them because that's just going to make things even weirder.

Open relationships only work if everyone involved is 100% excited about it. Don't keep this up if it makes you miserable.

It really depends on what exactly makes you uncomfortable. It's worth it to just be civil of the behavior in question isn't hurtful or problematic.