>a whopping 15 kilometers (or 24 in freedom units)

9.3 miles, not 24

>not my girlfriend cause we haven’t made it official yet but we both consider we’re a couple but we don’t wanna put a name to it

Situationship

They're gonna put him in the MRI, look at the screen showing the cross section of his brain, and see bright spots of heavy metal deposits and shit that just spell out FUCK

>just tryna get the job done

According to basically every study ever done on the subject, workplace accidents cost employers and the economy way more money and time than reasonable and effective prevention would have. And that's not including the human cost.

Quick someone photoshop Gwyneth Paltrow into the background of this picture

When I got my second COVID shot, the person giving it to me was like the cutest Navy Corpsman ever, and when I rolled up my sleeve they complimented my upper arm and I was like AH

"No need to clamp to control the bleeding, all my blood is, uh, somewhere else at the moment"

Manufacturing conglomerate State Og once accidentally produced Og Brand Wacky Washy Shampoo in a deceptively similar bottle to Og Brand Wacky Tacky Glue

When this error was brought to their attention, they continued selling both products this way because they hate their customers

They made fun of your robe and wizard hat? TURN THEM INTO FROGS

>and follower of bro code

But seriously. "Ignore people right in front of you who might be injured" isn't part of the bro code. What weird version of this do you have.

Many experts recommend professional therapists also utilize regular therapy in order to make sure they aren't going off the rails.

Then their providers also need therapy, and hey, it's therapists all the way down.

That's why we check them monthly- to ensure that the stuff that comes out is water, and not, say, a liquid form of black mold fungus.

> And this isn’t a trickle

This is a massive understatement. My lab's safety showers will fill up a five gallon bucket in ten seconds.

Mine are activated will a pull handle, which opens a valve in the ceiling. The first time my assistant and I did a safety check, I held the bucket while she pulled the handle. A few seconds later, I realized I'd made a critical error by not explaining how to close the valve before having her open it.

OK, we'll say "an amount that's lower than the industry standard for the very technical things that I do, but sufficiently adequate for my lifestyle"

Every time I've thought of something like this I also think "this is literally a thing my employer pays me a lot of money not to do"

And a bunch of ladies who are hugely successful in their own careers but did you know she's married to a doctor according to their mothers

I was at a party in college where a girl put a full 2 liter soda bottle into a pillowcase and swung it into some boy's face. He dropped instantly and then I don't know what happened because I decided to leave before the police showed up.

If he likes you back he'll still remember this well. Some of my most memorable evenings with women have been where we tried to make dinner and completely fucked things up.

Science Lesson Time: Caffeine is a type of organic chemical called an alkaloid. Plants make these chemicals to try and deter insects and small animals from feeding on them. In other words, alkaloids are some of nature's poisons. They are often particularly potent against small animals (because they can't take as much of a dose) and herbivores, because the evolutionary arms race is a son of a bitch. This is why the advice for giving pets caffeine is always going to be DON'T.

"Sucking at something is the first step to being sorta good at something" -Jake the Dog, from Adventure Time

This was a significant chunk of my entire childhood. Milk at every breakfast and dinner, and then I got sick soon afterwards, every time. I am lactose intolerant and my mother didn't understand this was even a thing. For the longest time I thought that everyone naturally got sick after drinking milk, but everyone just put up with it because it was "healthy".

In 2004 or so when I was a college student living in a studio apartment, I was working on a project over the winter break and wanted to heat treat some small titanium parts. The college's metal shop was closed for the break, so I decided to do it with a torch in my kitchen. The ventilation was not adequate and I gave myself metal fume flu, making myself really sick for two days. 1/10 got real sick, would not recommend (but the finish on my parts turned out sick (the other kind of sick))

In 2015 my city had a prolonged bout of extreme cold and snow, and a pipe burst in the building my company leases. The leak was directly above the main transformer for the building, which shorted and exploded, causing a fire. I got The Mother Of All Texts at 5am from my lab monitoring systems screaming that every fucking thing had switched to UPS power or was offline.

I raced into work in a blizzard and started our shutdown/tie-in protocol. The building owners ended up renting a truck-mounted generator for a week and parking it in the loading dock to provide emergency heating, emergency lights, and emergency power for critical equipment.

Look on the bright side, at least you didn't drill into:

• A hot water line
• A steam heating line
• A live electrical conduit
• The pipe that goes from your bathroom to the sewer

>I've recently moved into my own place for the first time

I remember all the bad habits and worse decisions I made when I did this (at 19) and also about how it was a learning experience in developing self-discipline.

Other things I learned were "don't heat anodize titanium in your kitchen over winter break when your college's metal shop is closed, because you will 100% get metal fume poisoning" and "you have class and work tomorrow and playing World of Warcraft until 3am will not help with that"

>next time

Dissolve your drink powder into a small amount of normal water first, so it becomes a concentrated liquid instead of a powder. Then add that into your carbonated water.