Bro, you don't know what is love. If you did, you wouldn't have been influenced that much and so many times. No offense but your story tell me that it was nothing but a crush and now you crush on her again because you can't have her anymore. Story is as old as humanity, we all crave what we can't have. The other thing you story says is that you are spineless and you can't stand for yourself. You would rather blame your friends and family along with yourself when the reason they reacted this way was mostly because of YOU. A real partner will communicate his feelings and encourage the reception of your significant other by those around you who count. If you can't tell your family and friends why you choose her and what happiness she brings you, if you can't explain why she is worth getting to know, they will obviously forge their opinion on what they see - which is going to be an awkward situation because a first meeting is always awkward if there's no foreplay to establish relations.

You not only failed to stand for yourself, you also failed her by not making friends and family understand why they should be thoughtful about her.

You should consider that you aren't ready for any for of real relationship. Go out and have fun if you want, but try to mature a little before using words like love.

People always crave what they can't have.

You weren't sure of what you wanted but now you are? You probably got confused out of boredom. Regardless of your feelings, you are not relationship material and should stay single to work on yourself. You either didn't really love her or didn't know how to commit.