Visual_Mission_1459
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j271lnv wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
it really isnt trust me ive tried to quit so many times. i started selfharming at 10/11 yrs old but here i am at 15 and still doing it even when i made promises, threw out blades and swore to myself i'd never do it again. im trying i really am i even cleaned my entire room and have been clean for selfharm for a few days. i am trying really hard to get better but i just dont have a support system..
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j2704up wrote
Reply to comment by Yourdepression in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
yeah but its different for me. i cant just not selfharm or quit drugs and shi its hard aff. trust me i flushed over a hundred pills down the toilet once bc i promised myself i'd get clean but i just couldnt do it so i relapsed once i found more pills. im gonna smoke a gram of weed soon anywayss
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26zop5 wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
its not that easy. the problem is im really unstable and i do shit impulsively and recklessly without even thinking. if it was so easy to just stop i wouldnt have made this post
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26z3ym wrote
Reply to comment by Yourdepression in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
i dont think you realize how addiction and mental health issues work.
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26u5w4 wrote
Reply to comment by AcrobaticSource3 in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
i cant. i always do reckless things and just realized it. was in the hospital for an attempt a few weeks ago and then got asked for nudes and then i drank fucking smirnoff and took valium with friends and ive been going up and down up and down like depressed happy and whatever. im just really unstable and idk what to do atp. im too scared to stop ive gotten too far deep and i find drugs and alcohol fun anyways. also scared to snitch bc as i mentioned in a previous comment my friends know gang members and im afraid of what will happen if i say anything
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26th9n wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
had a rough childhood and also have friends that do drugs and drink sooo thats your answer lol
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26lhrw wrote
Reply to comment by T0mDeMwoan in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
yah i know its just really really hard to quit drugs and all that but im trying not to be as reckless.
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26la2a wrote
Reply to comment by That-Pollution-6126 in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
im too scared to tell professionals bc i'll be called a snitch and people dont like snitches. also a few of my friends have communication with gangs and cartels so i rly dont wanna piss off any of those guys!
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26l00s wrote
Reply to comment by Arco_Sonata in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
thank you though im not sure if i'll be able to stop drinking since i rly enjoy alcohol and drugs and all that but im gonna try. as for fucking everyone im gonna try and stop that too even though i literally havent fucked anyone yet LMAO but ykwim im just gonna stop acting promiscuous.
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26kn6h wrote
Reply to comment by arlondiluthel in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
yeaaah that makes sense. he also just isnt ready yet but i was like rly drunk and just saying shit. im glad he didnt take advantage of me.
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j26kir9 wrote
Reply to comment by That-Pollution-6126 in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
thank you so much its just hard when taking my childhood into consideration so i basically feel like my body is my only worth. also its hard to not drink bc i rly love alcohol and drugs and lots of my friends do it like we smoke a shit ton of weed together and drink a lot together but ig i'll try and be safe with everything. thank you again.
Visual_Mission_1459 OP t1_j272nkp wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in TIFU by trying to hook up with my childhood bestfriend by Visual_Mission_1459
well the issue is its not rly alcohol that i abuse that much. i take pills to get high and i smoke weed and i cut myself or even burn myself occassionally. its an addiction to harm myself in any way possible ive even desensitized myself from gore and im getting fucked up each day. this is tiring..