I don't claim to be an authority on relativistic physics, so I may be making some incorrect assumptions here, but being "able to reach the singularity that much faster" only applies to the perspective of the person doing the accelerating. From our perspective (outside of the black hole), all of the material that "falls in" to a black hole builds upon itself infinitely AT the event horizon. So sure, your camera could accerlate towards the singularity and reach it really fast, but that's not an outcome that you would be able to observe from any other reference frame - it would never get there. We're in agreement about what would happen from the perspective of the object doing the accelerating.

If Hawking Radiation was as simplistic as you described, how would it cause your BH to lose mass? (You use the term "leaches" - I don't think that's a real science word) As far as I know, mainstream science agrees that Hawking Radiation is a tunneling process. (Source: https://arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/9907001, https://journals.aps.org/prl/abstract/10.1103/PhysRevLett.85.5042)

Well I think the issue is that the event horizon is not a thing to be moved or deformed. You can deform spacetime, which necessarily deforms your event horizon, but everything else (the origin of your pulse, for example) is also sitting at a specific point in spacetime, which is now deformed.

But also, from the perspective of "the inside" of the event horizon, there would be no direction you could choose that would take you out. It's less about something really strong pulling you backward, and more like reality itself has warped to the point of isolating you from the outside universe. What direction do you point your signaling device, when no direction is "outward?"

Correct me if I'm wrong, but the statement "gravity is so strong that nothing can escape" encapsulates a lot more physical ramifications than just a really strong "pull force" coming from the center of the black hole. Defeating gravitational stress in itself is mostly meaningless, because there are other mechanisms keeping you inside a black hole.

Spacetime becomes curved to the point where there is no path out of the black hole. You could be alive and your spacecraft be perfectly functional, any direction you choose will only take you around the inside of the event horizon, even if you could go faster than the speed of light.

Also remember, from a relativity standpoint, objects at the event horizon have stopped in time. I'm not sure this is perfectly correct, but from the perspective of an outside observer, your "pendulum tether" would only ever asymptotically approach the event horizon - there would never be an "upswing" with which you could pull anything out. So yes, if you could pull a wire out, you could have the information at the end of it, but you can't pull it out, so no universal secrets for you.

Now, the craziest part is that those last two paragraphs are two different ways of saying the same thing. Even weirder, we also already know of a mechanism by which energy can escape a black hole: quantum tunneling (see: Hawking Radiation). We just need to invent a method of information transfer via quantum tunneling, and then we could have someone transmit the information back out to us from just "inside" the event horizon. There are other problems with this, like: when would you expect to receive a return signal from an observer that has crossed the event horizon?

Current BH research suggests that you can recover all of the information about what has fallen into a black hole by looking at the "soft hair," which are the spacetime traces of the objects that have stopped in time at the event horizon - you don't even need any fancy camera on a wire.

I do not believe the analogy to a cave fish to be correct here.

Reading and using the internet, whether you're doing research review on Google Scholar, reading conspiracy theories on your favorite echo chamber social media site, or just straight gambling, you're likely engaging your brain more often than a guy with a stick in a cave was.

People can be dumb as shit, and still be formally intelligent. Ignorance is an entirely separate concept from raw intelligence.

As someone who very much dislikes opioids (qualitatively), but might like to partake in a nonzero amount of other recreational substances, not worrying about inadvertently nodding off and dying would be nice.

Obviously this is gross oversimplification, and there are tons of precautions one can take against accidentally ingesting anything laced with fentanyl, but I have no use for opioids; I would gladly pay some pharmaceutical company hundreds of dollars to permanently remove any recreational/therapeutic potential from opioids in exchange for immunity from incidental opioid overdose. Is it possible that I would regret that decision later if I got into a really nasty car accident, for example? Yes, and I'm willing to live with that, and I don't even have tattoos.

I see this as a win, even if it isn't pulling addicts up out of the gutters and fixing their problems.

So, how then, would one account for mathematically, something spinning at relativistic speeds. Black holes do this, don't they?

Is it just a transformatiom of the time dilation equation into circular [spherical/cylindrical] coordinates?

That one has potential for abuse for another reason: it potentiates opioids.

Yup. Even if drugs are your thing, you're not missing much by skipping out on the Benadryl.

I think this is one of those fringe cases where the distinction between "psychoactive drug" and "recreational substance" is meaningful. Benadryl is a psychoactive drug, but it is not recreational. You would not have a "good time."

Oh yeah, there's nausea too. Lots of nausea.

This. 1st generation antihistamines are full-blown psychoactive drugs, usually considered "deleriants."

Eating 8-10+ Benadryl will get you high asf for 6 or so hours, but like... Not a good high: Itchy, confused, and sleepy but unable to sleep.

Anecdotally, the nicotine rush is more intense coming off a dose of Benadryl. Nicotine at the same time as Benadryl negates the drowsiness.

Can you cite your source? Do you actually mean to say that QC in the supply chain of some legitimate drug is so poor that it's getting laced with Fentanyl?

I'd be interested to see what this is actually about, if it's not just a misunderstanding. Fentanyl can be obtained legally from a pharmacy.