I have a recommendation for fiction that's set in 1890s England-- Tipping the Velvet by Sarah Waters. It follows heroine Nan Astley, who dreams of a glamorous life after meeting Kitty Butler, a popular male impersonator music hall star. Kitty happens to be gay, and Nan soon realizes she's also attracted to women. The pair become a double act both on and off the stage, until Kitty breaks it off for the safety of a traditional life and marriage. Broken-hearted, Nan - in her guise as a male impersonator - takes to the streets to survive and finds a niche in the Victorian sexual underworld.

You're welcome!

It can be scary and confusing doing all this financial adult stuff that you're supposed to know, but no one really prepares you for it and you don't know to prepare because you don't know it's out there. Bit of a Catch-22.

That's shitty to have your forgiven loans counted as income. Plenty of businesses and rich people have gotten loans forgiven, but above below them can't? That's such BS.

Good luck!

1. Can you get the loans with higher interest refinanced to a lower interest rate one you're ready to start paying off your loans? With perhaps a co-signer on the loan of need be? Just to let you know, a co-signer will be responsible for the debt if you don't pay it. Think about how that will impact your relationship with them.

2. How old are you? I didn't start putting money in my fund until I was 25 and it was 2% to get my employer's 2% match. If you're in your late 20s, you still have time.

3. My personal opinion: start paying off those student loans to make life a little more easier in repaying them. If you really want to contribute to your Roth IRA, put some aside. Ex., you have $500/month to contribute to your student loans and/or IRA. You can pay $400/month to loans and %100/month to the IRA.

4. Once you finish your degree, would that open any side jobs to use those funds to pay off more of the loans?

$165,000÷120 months (10 years)= about $1,375/month, excluding interest.

So I don't know if the $4k and 1 year of payments left on our minivan means:

1.) I have $4k left on the minivan and it'll take me 1 year to pay it off; or

2.) I have $4k left (on something else) and ,in addition to that, 1 year of payments ($352/month) left on the minivan.

Once you've got the monthly minivan payment paid off, take that $352 and put it in you vacation fund; house remodel fund; kids' activities fund; 529 fund; activities for adults fund, etc. Ditto with the $3.1k childcare fund. When one kid needs less it, move it over to one of the above mentioned funds or another. Ex.: So when the 5-year-old's after-school care costs go down from $1k/month to $500/month, move the $500 to 1-2 fund or more.

As others have stated, I would not give up that flexibility with young kids. Update your resume every six months, so when they're in middle school, you can pursue a job with less flexibility and more money.