eatenbyalion
eatenbyalion t1_jdjy0lc wrote
Reply to My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
He shouldn't have rear-ended her. Then again, he has no requirement to wear pants and sit normally in his living room.
eatenbyalion t1_jb7bndb wrote
Reply to comment by LoveLivinInTheFuture in PsBattle: Jerry Seinfeld driving his 1970 Targa Florio-winning Porsche 908/03. by stash3630
"So what's up with Volkswagens? Do ya have to be "into Golf" to get one? I'll tell ya one thing they are good for - parking in the handicap spaces" boing boing ba-blip-a-doing....
eatenbyalion t1_jaxl9ek wrote
Reply to comment by phinbar in PsBattle: A cat with a helmet getting its claws trimmed. by ihaveabaguetteknife
I sniff them with a nice Chianti... tststststs
eatenbyalion t1_ja4dcnh wrote
Reply to comment by luntcips in They DoD realized they have too many Generals. by bigwolf29
Wingspan is typically the same as height or very close to it, so the joke wouldn't work as well.
eatenbyalion t1_j8rac26 wrote
Reply to comment by xtjan in Good old fusilli by PaleSubstance2
There are fusilli questions. Only silli answers.
eatenbyalion t1_j6d68kb wrote
Reply to comment by Jackrwood in This man went out with the boys, and told his wife that he would be home by midnight. by Jackrwood
A bit cruel to dish the dirt on your daughter like that.
eatenbyalion t1_j2zfl8l wrote
Reply to comment by Goldstar93 in [image] A little progress each day adds up to big results by _Cautious_Memory
Buddha need take look at Buddha's toilet bowl. Fat man fill thing fast! Need more than drop of water.
eatenbyalion t1_j1u8b5m wrote
Reply to comment by EvanThiccHahaCool in PsBattle: This toddler on a toy car by Shoelace_Farmer
He lives his life one quarter-yard at a time.
eatenbyalion t1_j0rf28k wrote
Reply to [image] by _Cautious_Memory
Detective-dog reports having a lead; the case is not cold yet!
eatenbyalion t1_iy42c0b wrote
He just needs to meet two criteria: 1. Dirty 2. Hairy
eatenbyalion t1_iy13zbl wrote
Reply to comment by RationalTunga146 in I was voted “Least likely to Succeed” by my high school class. by porichoygupto
Better Gym than Dwight.
eatenbyalion t1_ixsuvou wrote
Reply to comment by cerebron in Scotish fans ready for England vs USA by realbeats
Step 1: cut a hole in a sporran...
eatenbyalion t1_ixnej8x wrote
Reply to comment by Make_the_music_stop in It can get hairy. by Direct_Conclusion_40
Peter Rabbit was a pube-in-waiting.
eatenbyalion t1_iw9i66a wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in [OC] I bought and cooked 5.5 lb of chicken quarters. This is the breakdown of the weight throughout the process by dreaming-in-colour
Cruelty free - depends who you share a bed with after eating the beans.
eatenbyalion t1_ivcljg3 wrote
Reply to comment by Moe_Syzlak_ in [OC] An Ironman Triathlon, by the minute by ptgorman
Did you know, a hippopotamus can outswim you in water and outrun you on land. So if you meet one in a triathlon, your only chance to win is on the bike!
eatenbyalion t1_ivcklyf wrote
Reply to comment by timbasile in [OC] An Ironman Triathlon, by the minute by ptgorman
Hey isn't his grandpa Joeb Iden?
eatenbyalion t1_iv5zky6 wrote
Reply to comment by notrubraw in PsBattle: Cat riding a cat by BruceWayneWithMask
I think that rider's going for a bath.
eatenbyalion t1_itipbrt wrote
Reply to LeVar Burton's wedding, 1992. by PleasingScrum
And that night he boldly went where no man had been before...
eatenbyalion t1_istvfp3 wrote
I thought the lunettes d'or were awarded to the best referee. Why is Benzema wearing them?
eatenbyalion t1_irthvio wrote
Reply to comment by Careless_Bat2543 in Meeting your daily step goal really does work to prevent important illnesses. Taking more than 8,200 steps a day – the equivalent of walking around four miles – was found to protect against the likes of obesity, sleep apnoea, high blood pressure and major depressive disorder by Wagamaga
Your cells slowly die off, leading to complete extinction of life within 70-80 years on average.
eatenbyalion t1_ira5uxr wrote
Reply to comment by BatteryPoweredPigeon in PsBattle: Beaker Muppets congregating in a city at night by rxdrug
Was that before or after the Agent Orange got him?
eatenbyalion t1_ir200qm wrote
Reply to comment by deadalready6 in [Image] Tony Hawk’s Tweets About First Kickflip Post Injury by banaaanaaaaaa
No, that was Tony Tiger, not Tony Hawk.
eatenbyalion t1_iqm292u wrote
Reply to comment by Mediocre-Employee-73 in TIFU by getting a boner during Grandma’s funeral by [deleted]
Or the ones so strong they pop their head over for a look around.
eatenbyalion t1_je271uq wrote
Reply to comment by Phippsy771 in Never literally taking cooking instructions… by Phippsy771
It told me to marry Nate. Is a civil partnership ok?